Several Ways to Die Trying
by Spooky-Girl
Summary: For as long as he can remember, people have been calling Travis Strong crazy. For as long as he can remember, he took it with a grain of salt. But what if they're right...? R&R!
1. A Plain Morning

Standard disclaimer: If I owned the show, I'd be too busy being rich to be writing on my computer at three in the morning.Read, review, lemme know if you want me to finish!  
  
Rain.  
  
It was raining, again. No, scratch that, it had never stopped raining to begin with. For the past week, it had been raining steadily. Sometimes it was a drizzle, but most times it was in sheets, torrents of cold, depressing water.   
  
Lily Randall sighed and slumped further in her seat, listening to the teacher drone on monotonously, almost entirely drowned out by the pounding of the rain on the roof of Roscoe High. She buried her head in her hands, stifling a groan. It was only nine o' clock and she was already bored to tears. Usually, she would try to sneak Travis a note, as he sat in the seat next to hers, but today he was conspicuously absent. So instead, she gave herself away to mind numbing boredom.  
  
The door opened, interrupting her thinking, and a tired looking Travis walked in, silently handing the teacher a late slip and slid into his seat.   
  
Lily leaned over once the teacher continued the lecture. "Hey. Where were you?"  
  
Travis shrugged, laying his bag down on his desk and laying his had down.   
  
Lily frowned. "Okay...you look really tired."  
  
"I overslept," he finally said, turning his head to face her.  
  
  
  
"You? You never oversleep," Lily said skeptically.   
  
"Well, I did," he said.  
  
"Sorry," Lily backed off. "What's wrong?"  
  
Travis stared at her for a moment, then shrugged again. "Nothin'."  
  
"Mr. Strong, Ms. Randall, do you have something to add to the lesson?" the teacher asked, standing at the bored, glaring.  
  
"Uh–"  
  
"I was asking what I had missed," Travis said.  
  
"Well, see me after class next time," the teacher scowled.  
  
"Yes ma'am, I'll be sure not to do that," Travis said quickly."  
  
"Good," the teacher said, turning her attention to the board.  
  
Lily clapped a hand over her mouth to hide the giggle threatening to be voiced. He had spoken so quickly, the teacher hadn't even picked up that extra word that could have gotten him in trouble.  
  
Luckily, the bell rang, saving her, and she giggled aloud.   
  
"Travis, I can't believe you said that!" she said as they gathered their things.  
  
"Yeah," Travis said, cracking a faint smile. "She didn't even notice."  
  
He paused to get a drink at the water fountain, and she waited until he resurfaced, then lightly smacked his arm.   
  
"Hey! What was that for?" he asked, rubbing his arm as if it had hurt.  
  
She grinned, then began walking.  
  
Quickly realizing that he wasn't following, she tunred around. "Uh, English, Trav, remember?"  
  
"Yeah," he said, slipping his bag over his head.  
  
"You comin'?" she asked, rolling her eyes.  
  
She frowned when she realized he was actually debating on that.  
  
"Actually...I'm gonna..." he trailed off, jerking his thumb in the other direction.  
  
Lily's eyes widened in shock. "Cut?"  
  
Travis flinched at the word.  
  
"I can't believe you, of all people, are going to ditch class! You just got here!" she cried.  
  
"You done?" he asked. "The halls are emptying. I don't want to be conspicuous."  
  
"Done," Lily said, taking a step towards him. "So, where we goin'?"  
  
He narrowed his eyes. "You're...coming with me?"  
  
"What's life if you don't live a little, right?" she grinned.  
  
He smiled back, laughing. "You of all people...let's go."  
  
They scanned the halls for any faculty-like activity, then quickly walked to the nearest door, ducking out, raising their jackets over their heads, and keeping to the brisk pace until they were off of school grounds, safely a block away.  
  
"Have you given any thought to the fact that we might drown before enjoying this experience?" Lily half-yelled over the rain that now soaked them to the bone.  
  
"Not really!" Travis laughed, spinning around goofily. "I love the rain."  
  
"Yeah, me too," Lily said, "but not when it's freezing!"  
  
"Do you have gym clothes on you?" he said, falling into pace beside her.  
  
"Yeah, in my bag, why?" she asked, keeping her back under her jacket so her papers didn't get ruined.  
  
"We'll go to my house, you can change into them there," he explained.  
  
"If they're not soaked, too," she laughed. "Won't your parents be home?"  
  
"No," he said. "Not until late tonight."  
  
"You know, I've never actually been to your house," Lily said a few moments later.  
  
"I never even thought about that. I'm not used to having people over," he said, shrugging. "It's nothing special."  
  
"Sure it is!" she countered. "A person's room can tell you a lot about them."  
  
"Is that a good thing?" he asked, leading her up the stairs to a modest three story house, shaded behind a group of trees.   
  
Under the porch roof, sheltered from the rain, Lily nodded, ringing out her long blonde hair. "Yeah. It's...an insight!"  
  
Travis laughed and let them in the front door.   
  
The foyer was small, opening into a cramped hallway. Once you got over the tight space, the first thing that was noticeable was the spotlessness. A tidy living room, with a couch and entertainment center and neatly arranged coffee table. Polished hardwood floors, no clutter in sight.  
  
"Wow," Lily said.  
  
"Yeah, I know," Travis said.   
  
"It's so...clean," she marveled.  
  
"Yeah," he laughed. "Come on, my room's up here."  
  
He lead her up the stairs, past several rooms with closed doors, to a doorway at the end of the hall. He opened the door and yet another set of stairs greeted her. The staircase curved as they ascended, giving way to a large room.  
  
"Sweet," she remarked, taking in the contents.  
  
Against the wall of one side of the room was his bed, the blue flannel comforter hurriedly tossed on, pillows here and there. At the foot of the bed, a small dresser stood against the wall, and on top, a TV and DVD/VCR. Nearby, a desk was piled high with papers and a laptop computer. Against the opposite wall was a huge bookcase, reaching up to the ceiling, filled almost completely with books. Also lining the shelves were several radios and cameras of different natures. The floor was cluttered with a only few notebooks, a t-shirt and, a pair of PJ pants.  
  
"The only thing missing is the posters," she said. "Come on, no posters?"  
  
The walls were bare, painted blue.  
  
"No posters," he laughed. "How're the gym clothes?"  
  
Lily rummaged through her bag. "Still good."  
  
"You can change in here," Travis said, grabbing some clothes from his dresser. "That door is the bathroom. The one by the bed's a closet...you don't want to mistake it."  
  
She laughed, taking her gym clothes in hand. "Kay."  
  
"I'll be in the downstairs bathroom if you need me," he said.  
  
"Kay!" she repeated, heading into the bathroom.  
  
It too was neat, towels hung up, sink uncluttered, hamper shut, floor not full of yucky guy things.  
  
She shivered as she shrugged out of her jacket, hanging it over the shower rod to dry. She did the same with her jeans and t-shirt, thanking silently that hr undergarments remained dry. Shivering more, she let the air dry her skin before pulling on her sorts and Roscoe High School P.E. shirt.   
  
"Ugh," she said looking in the mirror.   
  
Her wet hair hung in strings. She lifted it up, wishing she had a something to hold it up with. Or a towel, maybe.  
  
She shivered again and opened the bathroom door.   
  
Travis was still downstairs.  
  
She rubbed her arms to generate some warmth, and headed down the stairwell, into the second floor hallway.   
  
"Travis?"  
  
When she got no answered, she headed for the half open door to her left, hoping it was the bathroom.  
  
"Travis?" she asked, pushing the door open the rest of the way.  
  
Travis jumped, in the middle of pulling on a shirt, spinning around, but not before Lily caught sight of a massive bruise stretching across his back and right shoulder blade.  
  
"Lily!"   
  
"Eep!" she cried, spinning around herself. "Sorry! The door was open!"  
  
"No worries," he said. "I'm decent."  
  
She turned around as he finished pulling down his long sleeved shirt.  
  
"My fault," he assured her. "I didn't check to make sure I shut the door all the way."  
  
She nodded, clearing her throat. "Um...what's the bruise from?"  
  
"Bruise?" he asked, furrowing his brow.  
  
"Yeah, you have this huge bruise on your back," she explained.  
  
"I thought that hurt a bit more than usual," he joked. "I got a bit sloppy at karate the other night. My partner slammed me onto the matt pretty hard. Guess that's it," he shrugged.  
  
"Ouch," she said, then slowly grinned. "Wait...you got beat?"  
  
"Haha," he said, giving her a look. "I'm not perfect."  
  
"No, I wasn't saying that," she said, confused. "I was joking."  
  
"I know," he laughed. "Gotcha!"  
  
"Geez," she rolled her eyes. "All I wanted was a towel!"  
  
Travis reached into a large wicker cabinet set into the wall and pulled out a fluffy towel, tossing it to her.  
  
"Thanks," she said.  
  
They walked back up to his room, where Travis literally jumped onto his bed, bouncing up and down.  
  
"Like a five year old," Lily laughed, drying her hair.  
  
"I love this bed," Travis said, snuggling down into the comforter. "It's the most comfortable thing ever."  
  
"Going materialistic on me, Strong?" she asked, narrowing her eyes.  
  
"No!" he said, sitting up. "It's just...comfortable."  
  
"Mm hmm," she said skeptically, sitting down by his feet. "Well...it does pass the Lily Randall butt test."  
  
Her comment was met with a raised eyebrow and a stare.  
  
"What?" she said innocently.  
  
"You're weird."   
  
"Look who's talking."  
  
He stared at her for a moment. "Why'd you come with me?"  
  
"What, today?" she asked, laying her towel on her lap.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Boredom...excitement...I live for danger!" she said, finally shrugging. "I dunno."  
  
"Fair enough," he said.   
  
"So, what're we doing?" she said, excited again.  
  
"I dunno...I hadn't thought much more than getting out the doors," he confessed.   
  
"Why don't we check out your state of the art, too expensive for me DVD player?" she grinned, eyeing his bookcase shelves full of movies.  
  
"Take your pick," he said, waving his arm at the array.  
  
"You better not just have cheesy ninja movies," she warned, heading over to take a look.  
  
Travis just smirked.  
  
"Cheesy ninja movie, cheesy ninja movie," she recited, looking at the titles. "'Nother cheesy ninja movie...Ooh! You have Stepmom? I love this movie!"   
  
She grabbed the DVD and brought it over to the bed, grinning like a little kid. "Explain why you have a total chick flick with your ninja movies."  
  
"It's a good movie, Lily," he laughed. "If you'll notice, I've got a wide variety of movies, not just cheesy ninja movies. Which aren't cheesy, mind you."  
  
Lily just gave him a look.  
  
"Okay. Mostly cheesy ninja movies," he admitted, popping the DVD into the player.  
  
He hit play and headed back to the bed, arranging the pillows at the headboard to prop himself up. Lily remained sitting on the side of the bed.  
  
Travis laughed. "Lily, it's not going to kill you to lay down on my bed."  
  
Lily tried to look offended. "I wasn't...okay, fine, I was content to sit there for several hours."  
  
Travis shook his head. "I promise, I won't put the moves on you."  
  
"As if you could even!" she cried, but relented, moving into position next to him.   
  
Several minutes passed before Lily began to shiver again.  
  
"Lily, are you going to have a heart attack if I pull the covers over us?" travis teased, nudging her with his elbow.  
  
She stuck out her tongue. "No."  
  
"Good," he said, and pulled his thick blanket over them. "Better?"  
  
"Mmm...soft," she said sleepily. "Blankie..."  
  
"Okay, now I'm scared," Travis laughed.  
  
"Just joshin'," Lily grinned, pulling the blanket up to her chin. "Movie time."  
  
And they settled amongst the covers to watch the chick flick. 


	2. The Streets Were Wet

Wow! I've never gotten so many notes so fast! Thanks guys, and yeah, it was a bit rushed. *blushes* So's this part, really, but I wanted to get it up before I go out the door, so, sorry! :D   
  
Ray and Robbie were already at the station when Lily and Travis came rushing in from the downpour, shaking their umbrellas, and somehow still soaked. Both looked up as the door banged open.  
  
"Well, well, well," Ray said, clapping his hands together. "Look who it is!"  
  
"Lily and Travis!" Robbie joined in, grinning. "Both of who were mysteriously absent today."  
  
"We weren't absent," Lily said, putting her borrowed umbrella down. "We were in school."  
  
"Then where were you fifth period?" Robbie pointed out.  
  
"And lunch," added Ray. "Oh, and also sixth, seventh, eighth...need I continue?"  
  
"Ray, we don't even have all those classes together," Lily said, staring at him. "Are you stalking me?"  
  
"What? No," Ray said hurriedly. "I just happened to be wandering the halls."  
  
Robbie laughed. "Unlike Pronto here, I DO have those classes. With both of you."  
  
"So 'fess up," Ray said, imitating a sherriff's western drawl. "Where were ya?"  
  
Travis, setting up in the tech booth, broke in, "We're on in a minute. Cut the interrogation."  
  
"This isn't over!" Ray cried dramatically, putting on his headphones.  
  
They waited for Travis to count them down, slipping into their radio persona's like a second skin.   
  
At his cue, Question Mark started in, "This is Radio -"   
  
"Free -" Shady Lane chimed.  
  
"Roscoe!" Pronto finished.  
  
"I'm Question Mark, and I'm wondering, what's the deal with P.E?" Robbie said, leaning into the mic. "I mean, what's the point?"  
  
"Wait," Shady interrupted. "I thought you liked gym class?"  
  
"He did," Pronto laughed. "Until he got owned in a game of basketball. By a girl. In front of the whooole class."  
  
"What's the problem?" Shady continued. "That happens to lots of guys."  
  
"Not to good ol' Question Mark here," Pronto laughed again. "This was his first time."  
  
"I don't get it," Shady complained. "Girls can play sports just as well as guys. What's the big deal if you get beaten by one? It's the same as if a guy beats you!"  
  
"No it isn't!" Question Mark cried. "It's humiliating."  
  
"And we've got a string of calls," Smog said with humor in his voice. "No doubt from many raging female athletes."  
  
"You've done it now," Shady said in a sing song voice.  
  
Travis held up the chalkboard, where the name 'JJ' was scrawled.  
  
"Well, JJ, what's you're opinion?" she asked.  
  
"Guys are so insensitive," the girl's voice came over the speakers. "WE can play just as good as you, it shouldn't be humiliating for us to win!"  
  
"Well, that's one opinion," Ray said, glancing at Travis. "What about you, Jim?"  
  
A male voice filtered through the speakers. "Girls just don't get it. Sports is OUR area to excel. It's bad when they take that away from us. Chicks shouldn't be more masculine than we are!"  
  
"Word of advice," Shady said. "We prefer being called girls, not chicks."  
  
"Even I have to admit that was a bit chauvinistic," Question Mark said.   
  
"What about you, Ace?" Lily asked, checking the chalk board. "What do you have to say?"  
  
Another male voice came on. "Personally, I like a girl who can offer some competition. I don't think it's embarrassing to lose to a worthy opponent. Plus...it's kinda sexy!"  
  
Pronto laughed. "My man!"  
  
"Perfect way to segue into some music," Question Mark said. "Shady?"  
  
"For your listening pleasure," she said. "Here's Trapt with Still Frame."  
  
Travis cued the music, and they paused to remove their headphones.   
  
"So," Ray started in, "do we get to know where you guys where, or what?"  
  
"You're relentless!" Lily said, throwing her hands up in the air.   
  
"Well?" Robbie asked. "Do we?"  
  
"No!" Lily laughed.  
  
"Travis?" Ray prodded. "Come on, man!"  
  
Travis responded with. "We're back on in five, four..."  
  
The rest of the broadcast went smoothly, aside from the constant prodding. Robbie got the point eventually, and stopped asking, but Ray was, true to Lily's description, relentless.  
  
"Ray," Lily said calmly as they gathered up their belongings. "I'm going to walk out the door now."  
  
"Come on, Lil!" Ray pleaded. "Give me a hint!"  
  
  
  
She whistled nonchalantly.  
  
"Travis?" Ray asked.  
  
"Sorry, I've gotta get to karate," he said, winking, and dashing out the door with a laugh.  
  
"Someone's in a good mood," Robbie remarked.  
  
"Yeah," Ray agreed.  
  
"Well, gotta run!" Lily said, lest she be tag teamed. "Gotta make dinner for mom!"  
  
Ray and Robbie watched her go with confused looks.   
  
"Man...those two are weird today."  
  
Lily didn't really have to make dinner. In fact, her parents weren't even going to be home that night, so she was free to gorge herself on ice cream if she wanted. Instead she headed downtown. She was hoping to catch up with Travis and maybe give back the umbrella, but if not, she could always, oh, say...shop.  
  
She saw a figure walking ahead of her, and wondered if it was Travis. She started to call out, but stopper herself. She wasn't stupid. It was dark out, and it wasn't really safe to be yelling at strangers on an isolated side street.   
  
She followed the person, who seemed to be taking the same route as her, until they were downtown, safely among the crowds and streetlights.  
  
Unfortunately, Lily lost the would-be Travis in the throng of people out to shop in the Friday night. The rain had died down to a drizzle, at people were taking advantage of it.   
  
Lily could relate. A little wetness was a small sacrifice to pay for the freedom. They'd all been pretty much confined to their homes, businesses, etc, since the rain had started. Now, it was time to breathe some fresh, albeit moist, air.  
  
She headed to the music store, first, checking out their selection, then made her way from store to store, perusing the supplies, wondering what to blow her money on. She finally settled on a really cool pair of shoes at the department store. Cheap, yet awesome...just her style.  
  
With her purchase swinging in her hand, she headed for home. About halfway there she realized she still had Travis's father's umbrella. She didn't know whether he'd need it back, or if his father had a spare, but she knew her father didn't like her to lend out his things for extended periods of times, so she decide to swing past his house and drop it off.   
  
Locating the house proved more difficult than she remembered, what with the darkness and the unfamiliar territory, but she did it.   
  
Climbing the stairs, she set down her bag and pressed lightly on the doorbell, shaking off the umbrella. There was no answer, so she tried knocking.  
  
"Lily?" a voice said from behind her, startling her.  
  
She let out a yelp, jumping around.   
  
"It's just me!" Travis said from the bottom of the stairs.  
  
"Geez," Lily said, "give a girl a heart attack."  
  
"What are you doing here?" he asked, standing still at the bottom of the stairs.  
  
"Oh, uh, I came to return your dad's umbrella," she said. "I didn't know if he needed it or..."  
  
"Thanks," Travis said simply.   
  
"You gonna stand there all night?" she joked, straining to see him beyond the porch light.  
  
He sighed and climbed the stairs.  
  
"Travis!" Lily cried. "What happened?"  
  
He didn't seem to understand at first. "What?"  
  
"You're bleeding!" she cried, rushing to him.  
  
"Oh, still?" he muttered, putting his sleeve to his bloody nose.   
  
  
  
"What happened?" she asked again.  
  
"I've got a problem with hitting girls," he said, going past her to unlock the door. "But my sensei has no problem with pairing me up against them."  
  
Lily furrowed her brow. "I don't get it."  
  
"I hold back," Travis shrugged. "She doesn't."  
  
Lily frowned.  
  
"Thanks for bringing back the umbrella," he said. "You want me to walk you home?"  
  
"No," she shook her head. "That's okay."  
  
"Alright," he said, letting himself in. "See you tomorrow."  
  
He left her standing on the porch, still frowning.  
  
"Okay..." 


	3. You Kissed Me Like You Meant It

Welp, here's the next part of 'Several Ways to Die Trying'...hope ya like it, because I'm now completely addicted to getting a buncha cool reviews! You guys rock! :D Oh, and about my off spacing...yeah, I dunno what that's about. I guess copying it into WordPad to make it a text document messes with the original format. Whatever... it works, right? :P  
  
*****  
  
"Mmm, Saturday," Lily said, breathing in deeply, spreading her arms out wide. "It's a good thing! Especially dry ones!"  
  
"Someone's excited," Robbie laughed.  
  
"Who's idea was it to hang out at a playground anyway?" Ray asked, glancing down at the muddy ground. "You know they make her hyper."  
  
"Okay, a: they do not," Lily said, spinning around on the tire swing she was perched on. "And b: it was yours."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Ray, you're one of a kind," Robbie said with a grin.  
  
"Why thank you, Robbie!" Ray started to say.  
  
"I'm not sure that was a complement, Ray," Lily grinned.  
  
"Hey, not to break up the Ray-bashing that I so thoroughly enjoy," Robbie broke in, "but where's Travis? Wasn't he supposed to meet us here?"   
  
"Uh, I dunno," Ray replied. "Lily, didn't you call him?"  
  
"Yeah, he's gonna meet us," she explained. "He said he had to do some stuff, but he'll be here."  
  
"Ahh," Ray nodded. "The ever mysterious 'stuff'."  
  
"Yeah," Lily said quickly. "Speaking of Travis…has anyone noticed anything weird about him lately?"  
  
"Lily," Ray said slowly, as if speaking to a child. "Think about what you just asked."  
  
Robbie nodded. "You do have to admit, Travis is always weird."  
  
"Guys!" Lily cried.  
  
"I didn't say it was bad!" Robbie protested.  
  
"Okay, fine," she said, waving her hands. "Weirder."  
  
"Well, now that you mention it - no," Ray shook his head.  
  
"Weirder how?" Robbie wanted to know.  
  
"I don't know exactly," Lily shrugged. "He's just been…off lately."  
  
Ray kicked his heels against the slide he sat on. "Lily, Travis is always off. Face it, he's not normal."  
  
"Ray!" she admonished, standing shakily on the swing to punch him.  
  
"Owww," he moaned, rubbing his bruised shoulder. "Like Robbie said, I never said that was bad or anything. It's just…"  
  
"It's just Travis," Robbie shrugged.  
  
"My ears are burning," Travis's voice cut in suddenly.  
  
"Oh! Hey," Lily said, sitting back down. "Yeah, we were wondering when you'd get here."  
  
Travis looked at the sleeve of his jacket, checking an imaginary watch. "Now?"  
  
"Wait…your ears are burning?" Ray said, furrowing his brow.  
  
"It's an old saying," Robbie said. "When someone's talking about you, your ears are supposed to burn…or something."  
  
"That's really…weird," Ray stated.  
  
"Yeah," Lily agreed.   
  
"So, what's going on?" Travis asked, sitting on the swing next to Lily and kicking off.  
  
"Enjoying the freedom that is the weekend in true form," Lily said, spinning around again.   
  
"Yeah," Ray added. "Doing absolutely nothing!"  
  
"Works for me," Travis said.   
  
"Where were you anyway?" Robbie asked, sitting on the slide below Ray's feet.  
  
"Nowhere, really," Travis shrugged. "Just running errands."  
  
"Errands," Ray said distastefully.   
  
"Yeah," Travis laughed.  
  
"How's your nose feel?" Lily asked then, digging her heels into the wet ground to stop her swing.  
  
"His nose?" ray and Robbie asked practically in unison.  
  
Travis shot her a quick, unreadable look.  
  
"Uh…oops," Lily winced.  
  
"What're we missing?" Robbie asked, grinning.   
  
"Nothing," Travis said. "I lost a karate match is all."  
  
"Woah!" Ray cried, holding his hands to his chest in shock. "The Kung Fu master lost?"  
  
"I'm only human, Ray," Travis said slowly, looking at Lily. "He was a worthy adversary."  
  
Lily caught his eye and read this look well. It was a look that said, 'please don't tell them I got beat up by a girl. They'll never let me live it down.'  
  
"Okay, okay, enough chat," Robbie said. "What do you say we go catch a movie or something?"  
  
"Aww, and leave the pwaygwound?" Ray pouted.  
  
"Shut up before I hit you again," Lily laughed.  
  
"Okay, okay," Ray said. "Movie is good."  
  
Robbie stood up, allowing Ray to slide down to the ground.   
  
They started off, leaving Lily and Travis to extract themselves from their swings.  
  
"Sorry about that," Lily said. "I didn't know you didn't want them to know."  
  
"Don't worry," Travis shrugged it off. "It was wrong of me not to admit to it like that. She was a worthy adversary. I was just giving into that macho male act."  
  
"I forgive you," she laughed, punching his shoulder lightly. "Happens to the best of them, right?  
  
"Right," he said, nodding slowly. "Let's catch up."  
  
"So, what did you have to do?" she asked as they began to walk. "You can tell me."  
  
  
  
"Nothing important," he smirked. "Just stuff."  
  
"Stuff," Lily repeated. "Hmm."  
  
He laughed. "It's not important enough to bear that much thinking about."  
  
"Fine, fine," Lily said in defeat. "I'll give up…if I must."  
  
"Hey, guys!" she called out to Ray and Robbie, "wait up!"  
  
When they reached their friends, Lily said, "I'm gonna skip the movie, okay? I wanna go check out some music at that new store."  
  
"Gasp!" Ray cried. "You're forsaking Mickey's like that?"  
  
"Mickey doesn't have the new Yellowcard CD," Lily explained. "And also, I have a feeling you want to see Alien Invaders From Planet Scary Part Nine."  
  
"It's planet Destruct-o," Robbie laughed.   
  
"And it's good!" Ray backed him up.  
  
"Uh huh, yeah," Lily said. "You just proved my point."  
  
"Fine. Just the guys then. Travis, you in?" Ray asked, clapping his hand around his shoulder.  
  
"Sorry," Travis said, wincing as he ducked out from under Ray's arm. "But I'm gonna stick with Lily. I prefer cheesy ninja movies to cheesy alien flicks."  
  
Ray eyed him for a moment. "Alright…but you don't know what you're missing."  
  
"We'll give you a call after the movie's over," Robbie called over his shoulder as they parted.  
  
Travis nodded, rubbing his shoulder absently.   
  
"Bye!" Lily called, looking over. "Your shoulder still hurt?"  
  
"Huh? Oh, no," Travis said, pulling his hand away.   
  
"No offense," Lily said as they began to walk, "but maybe you should tell your teacher to partner you up with someone less…evil."  
  
Travis nodded. "Yeah. Maybe so."  
  
"Or," Lily said, watching him from the corner of her eye. "Maybe you should stop holding back."  
  
He looked over. "I can't."  
  
"Why not?" Lily said. "It's like that guy said last night. If she's a worthy competitor, you shouldn't feel bad about losing to her. And if she's worthy, then don't you at least owe her a fair fight?"  
  
He took in a deep breath. "Ace."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"The guy's name," he explained. "It was Ace. And you're right."  
  
Lily smiled. "I do like hearing that."  
  
"Don't you have a CD to look for?" he asked, shoving her lightly.  
  
"Hey, what happened to not hitting girls?" she cried.  
  
"That wasn't hitting," he grinned.  
  
"I am so gonna get you," she announced.  
  
"I'm feeling threatened!" Travis laughed.  
  
"I have a purse and I'm not afraid to use it!" she cried, swinging it over her head.  
  
He took off running, "Nooo!"  
  
Laughing, she gave chase, her bag swinging at her hip. "I'm gonna get you!"  
  
She could tell he wasn't running full speed, and soon caught up with him, launching herself onto his back. He gave a yelp of surprise, stumbling, but somehow not falling.   
  
"Whee!" she cried, wrapping her legs around his waist, arms around his neck.  
  
"Hey!" he cried. "I'm not a horse!"  
  
"You are now," she laughed giddily as he began to spin around in circles.  
  
"Slow down, I'm getting dizzy," she warned, holding on tightly.  
  
"Should've thought of that!" he yelled.   
  
Lily was laughing too hard to reply when the world tilted crazily and she felt the air whoosh out of her as her back connected none-too-softly with the pavement.   
  
"Sorry," Travis panted, laughing. "Got too dizzy."  
  
Lily sucked in a breath when she was able, trying to hold back her own giggles. "No damage done."  
  
She spread out her arms, feeling the cool ground against her back, eyes closed, waiting for the world to stop spinning.  
  
When she finally felt she was able to open her eyes, Travis was staring down at her, propped up on his elbow.   
  
"I didn't hurt you, did I?" he asked, peering at her.  
  
"No," she said, blinking. "I'm…okay."  
  
He groaned and slowly got to his feet. "Okay…up we go."  
  
She laughed as he reached down a hand to help her up. Clutching her side with one hand, she accepted, and let him yank her to her feet. Still giggling, she tripped over her own feet and lurched into him, almost sending them both back to the ground.  
  
But suddenly Lily wasn't laughing. Suddenly she was staring into his gray eyes, totally and completely oblivious to anything else. Suddenly she was kissing Travis.  
  
She wasn't even aware when it happened. There was no recollection of closing her eyes, or leaning in, breathing in his scent, but the next thing she knew, their lips met, and she was completely overwhelmed.  
  
A few seconds passed before they both pulled away and opened their eyes, coming to realize what had happened.  
  
Lily bit her lip, still tasting him there, watching his eyes for any signs, heart pounding, mind racing.  
  
"Uh-" he faltered  
  
"Not the most comforting thing a girl wants to hear after something like that," she said, still locked in his gaze.  
  
"I'm sorry," he said. "I shouldn't have…I didn't mean to-"  
  
"That's no better," she said softly, looking down at the ground.  
  
"No!" he said. "I didn't mean."  
  
She blinked rapidly, still not sure what had happened, but knowing she didn't want it to be a mistake.  
  
"Okay," he said, breathing deeply. "Let me try that again. It was an accident."  
  
"That's the same as 'I didn't mean to', Travis," she said, looking still downward.  
  
"Except I did mean to. I think I meant to," he faltered. "What I'm trying to say is, I don't regret it."  
  
She dared to look at his face. "Really?"  
  
"It's just that…" he stared at her, his brow wrinkling in deep thought. "I shouldn't have done that."  
  
"What?" she practically shouted. "Why not?"  
  
Travis ran a hand through his hair, down over his face, rubbing his eyes. "I…I gotta go."  
  
"What?!" Lily cried. "Travis, you can't just leave-"  
  
"Lily," Travis said softly, taking hold of her arm. "I'm sorry."  
  
She returned her gaze to the ground, not wanting to watch him walk away.  
  
He may have been sorry, but she wasn't. 


	4. Your Heart Lead Fall

Due to a complaint, hehe, I'm going to sate this oficially: This is going to be a T/L fic. I didn't start it intending it to be (or maybe subconciously I did, I didn't pay attention is Psychology) but that's the way it went! That's the couple I cheer for, so that's the couple this fic shall feature...eventually. :D So, sorry about not having that earlier, but it just sorta...happened. Hope you guys are still enjoying it, and I'm trying to pick up the pace a bit, since the last chapter wasn't exactly heart stopping.   
  
****  
  
Lily groaned in frustration, pressing a button on her cell phone to end her call and angrily shoved it into her pocket. It was a Saturday night at Mickey's and she had given up her seat to make this call. Then, he didn't even answer.   
  
She pushed through the door and headed inside to where Robbie and Ray were sitting. Of course, the seat she had occupied previously was taken. Typical.  
  
"Grr!" she announced, standing in front of them.  
  
"What's wrong?" Robbie asked, moving his arm so that she could perch herself on the arm of his char.   
  
She sat down. "He didn't answer."  
  
"So?" Ray asked, slurping his shake. "That's, like, the tenth time you tried to call him."  
  
"Yeah, what's so important?" Robbie asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"Nothing," she sighed.  
  
"Yeah, we believe that one," Ray said with a roll of his eyes. "Spill!"  
  
"Really, it's nothing -" she started to say.   
  
The chirping of her phone caught her off guard and she almost fell off the chair trying to extract it from her pocket. Robbie caught her arm and, ignoring Ray's laughter, she answered.  
  
"Hello?" she said, pausing to make a face at Ray. "Yeah, I was trying to call you. Where are you?"  
  
Robbie looked to Ray, who shrugged.  
  
"Oh...okay. No...you want us to come over?" she was saying, pausing intermittently. "Okay, if you sure..."  
  
Ray cleared his throat, and Lily put her finger to her ear to better hear, mouthing 'shut up' to him.  
  
"Okay, talk to you later? 'Kay. Bye," she said, clicking her cell phone off and returning it to her pocket. "That was Travis."  
  
"Ahhh, what's Swami up to on this fine evening?" Ray asked, licking some of his shake off the end of his straw.  
  
"He's at the station," she said. "I don't know what he's doing, but I asked him if he wanted us to come hang and he said no."  
  
"Man, that guy needs some friends," Ray laughed. "Oh...wait. That's right."  
  
Robbie glanced at him briefly. "So he just wants to hang out alone, by himself?"  
  
"That's the definition of alone, Rob-o," Ray said.  
  
Lily was frowning still.  
  
"What's up?" Ray asked her. "Turn that frown upside down!"  
  
When his usual goofy self didn't cheer her up, he stopped grinning. "Lily?"  
  
"What's wrong?" Robbie asked, catching Ray's eye.  
  
"I'm just afraid he's still upset," Lily said, biting her lip.   
  
  
  
"Over...?" Ray drew out.  
  
"Travis kissed me this afternoon," she said in a rush of breath. "He got really upset."  
  
"He did what?" Ray said, tapping his ear to convey: 'did I hear right?'.  
  
"He kissed me," she repeated. "Or, well, I kissed him, too."  
  
Ray clenched his teeth together. "Really?"  
  
"Yeah...it was an accident, and he kept apologizing, but I don't think he was really sorry. At least, I hope he wasn't," Lily said in a rushed tone.   
  
Ray stood up, eyes flashing.  
  
"Ray?" Robbie said, questioning.  
  
Ray didn't answer, just headed for the door.  
  
"What's with him?" Lily asked, looking at the door swinging shut.  
  
"Umm...probably not the best thing you could have said to him," Robbie explained.  
  
"What?" Lily asked. "Why not?"  
  
"Lily, maybe you haven't noticed, but Ray likes you," Robbie explained. "Really likes you. A lot."  
  
"He...does?" Lily replied, turning to the door again.  
  
"Yeah..." Robbie said. "I think maybe we should catch up to him."  
  
"What...you don't think he'd...do you?" Lily said, watching him for an answer.  
  
"I think we'd better go," Robbie said, getting up quickly. "He's at the station?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
***  
  
Ray had a good head start and angry adrenaline pushing him. Lily's heart was racing as she and Robbie briskly jobbed toward the RFR station, trying to catch up with him.   
  
"Do you really think we have reason to be running, Robbie?" Lily worried.  
  
"I really hope not," was all he could reply.   
  
"I mean, we've known him forever," she panted. "When have you seen him really, really angry?"  
  
"Just now," Robbie answered, glancing over as they ran.  
  
Lily's heart sank, and she pressed herself to go faster.  
  
***  
  
Travis was just leaving the building when Ray got there. He shut the door behind him and turned around to see his friend standing a few feet away, and jumped.  
  
"Ray," he said, taking a deep breath. "What are you doing? You nearly gave me a heart...attack."  
  
Ray clenched his fists at his sides, breathing heavily, glaring.  
  
"Ray?" Travis asked, fighting the urge to back up a step. He'd never seen Ray so angry.  
  
"How could you, Travis?" Ray seethed.  
  
"How could I what?" Travis asked, his heart racing.  
  
"You knew how I felt," Ray forced out. "You knew how much I like Lily."  
  
Travis opened his mouth, but couldn't find anything to say.  
  
"You knew," Ray repeated. "And you kissed her."  
  
"Ray," he said, shaking his head, "I'm sorry."  
  
"You're sorry!?" he exploded, taking a step forward. "Sorry?!"  
  
"I didn't mean to," Travis said hurriedly. "It just happened. I'm sorry."  
  
  
  
"And that makes everything alright?" Ray cried.  
  
"No," Travis faltered. "I..."  
  
"You what?" Ray asked, coming ever closer. "What could you possibly have to say?"  
  
Travis opened his mouth again, but Ray had heard enough.   
  
"Shut up!" he shouted, and ran for him.  
  
The next thing Travis knew, he was crashing heavily to the pavement, his back connecting with the gravel, sliding back. Ray was on top of him, screaming words Travis couldn't hear, his fists pounding at him. He wasn't aiming, simply focusing his anger into hitting as hard as he could, wherever he could. Most of the blows glanced off of Travis's arms, which were crossed and held in front of him to protect his face, but some connected.  
  
"Why aren't you fighting back!?" Ray screamed in a rage, his left fist coming in contact with Travis's ribs.  
  
Travis let out a cry, and his arms came down to clutch at the ground, looking for something to hold on to, something to help him push away from Ray's body, but it only left his face open to his fists.  
  
"Fight back, damn it!" Ray cried, his blows losing some, but not all, of their strength.  
  
A particularly nasty punch to his right cheek was what made Travis react. He drew up his knees as fast as he could, knocking Ray off balance, and scooted backward, pushing the soles of his shoes against Ray's chest, knocking him the rest of the way off.   
  
As Ray fell to the side, he scrambled to his feet, backpedaling a few paces, and breathing heavily. "I'm not going to fight you, Ray!"   
  
Ray got to his feet, face contorted in anger, and rushed him again.   
  
Travis sidestepped him, and Ray crashed to his knees. This only made him more angry.  
  
"Ray! Travis!"   
  
From the distance, from the darkness, their voices rang out. Lily and Robbie.  
  
Coming to his rescue?  
  
Travis looked off into the night, trying to locate them. He began to shout their names, but Ray slammed into him, sending him back to the ground.  
  
He screamed as his face connected, feeling the gravel pierce skin. He was aware that his head had hit the pavement pretty hard, but felt only a numbness.  
  
"Ray!" he heard Lily scream. "Oh my God!"  
  
The punch to his ribs was at only half force, and he could feel Ray's gaze turn to the figures he knew had approached.  
  
With Ray's attention turned, he roughly shoved him off, and rolled onto his stomach, getting to his knees and crawling a few feet away. He could barely see, he just wanted to get away.  
  
***  
  
Lily felt Robbie bump into her as she stopped in her tracks. In the streetlight she could see Ray tackle Travis, see him slam into the ground, Ray on top, reaching back a fist to punch him.  
  
"Ray!" she screamed, grabbing at Robbie. "Oh my God!"  
  
Ray looked up at her cry landing his punch, and his face melted from anger to confusion. Beneath him, Travis shoved him off.   
  
He still held her gaze as he landed on his butt.  
  
Travis, now on his hands and knees, crawled blindly away from his attacker.  
  
Ray had done this...  
  
She could feel Robbie clutching her shoulder painfully, as in shock as she was herself.   
  
Ray sat there staring into her eyes, and she realized that he didn't fully understand what he had done. He hadn't looked at Travis, seen the damage he'd incurred...  
  
...Travis...  
  
Lily broke eye contact with Ray and moved her gaze to Travis, who was sitting against the brick wall of the station, head hanging, legs splayed out in front of him.  
  
"Travis!" she cried, running to him.  
  
Robbie quietly approached Ray, reached out a hand and helped him to his feet.  
  
"I suggest you get out of here," he said to his friend. "Because as much as it hurt to see her run to him, it's gonna hurt so much more when she finds out how bad you hurt him."  
  
Ray stopped to give a glance at Travis and Lily, and then began to walk off, in a daze, gradually gaining speed until he was running full tilt away from the scene.  
  
Lily knelt down by his side, taking his hand out of impulse. "Travis?"  
  
He looked up and offered a half hearted smile. "Hey."  
  
Lily felt like crying at the sight of him.   
  
His lip was split, mixing with the blood that poured from his nose, and his left cheek was badly scraped, bits of gravel still embedded in the skin. His gaze was heavy lidded and pained as he returned her gaze.   
  
"He really likes you, you know," he half whispered.   
  
"I know," she said, biting her lip. "How are you?"  
  
He attempted to shrug, but ended up groaning in pain. "He's pretty strong, too."  
  
He leaned forward, wincing, and wrapped an arm around his chest, cradling his aching side.  
  
Lily put her arm around him to help him stand, but pulled back quickly, frowning. Her hand was covered in blood.  
  
"Travis, can you lean forward a little bit more?" she asked as Robbie came to kneel next to his other side.  
  
He complied, biting back another groan, and she lifted up his jacket and t-shirt. His back, too, was badly scraped and bloody.  
  
"Is Ray gone?" she said flatly as they helped Travis climb shakily to his feet.  
  
"Yeah," Robbie said, trying to read her look.  
  
"Good," she said angrily. "Cos I'm gonna kill him next time I see him."  
  
"He had a right to be angry," Travis said softly.  
  
"I don't care! He didn't have a right to beat the crap out of you!" she cried. "And YOU. Why didn't you fight back?!"  
  
"I couldn't fight him," Travis said, looking at her. "He's my friend."  
  
She stared for a minute, then blinked rapidly. "I don't care."  
  
But there was less anger in her voice now.  
  
"Come on, man, we gotta get you home," Robbie said, shaking his head. "You're looking pretty bad."  
  
"No!" Travis said, trying to shake off their arms. "My dad will flip out if I go home like this."  
  
"Okay...then...my house," Lily said. "My mom's a nurse, she's got all kinds of stuff there. We can clean you up."  
  
"I'm fine," he protested. "I'll just...I dunno..."  
  
"Travis, shut up and let us help you," she said softly. "You think you can walk that far?"  
  
Travis just nodded.  
  
"Good." 


	5. A Trophy Display of Bruises

Wow, only two reviews on that last chapter. You guys would tell me if I started to suck, right? Right!? AH! Anyyyhoo, a few quick notes!  
  
1. Let's say for the sake of the story that the guys are now, say, 17? Juniors. Sorry, but once I started writing this I realized it's easier to write about seventeen year olds in love than fourteen year olds. So they're 17 in this.  
  
2. Someone pointed out a similarity to another RFR story they had read, so I'm gonna NOT read any stories until I get this done. I don't like having similarities, because then sometimes mean people accuse you of stealing ideas. Happened to a friend of mine, and it got her really upset, so I'm just gonna hold off for now. Maybe once I get this done there'll be a whole lot of new chappies for me to read! *hint, hint!*  
  
3. *sniff* Review me! Let me know if you want something to change, etc, etc...I hope this is still interesting.  
  
So, without further delay...Enjoy!  
  
***  
  
"I feel really bad dumping you guys like this," Robbie said, standing on Lily's front porch. "My dad will kill me if I'm any later, though."  
  
"It's okay," Lily assured. "Thanks for helping me get him this far."  
  
"Yeah," Robbie nodded. "Travis, take care, okay?"  
  
Travis nodded, staring at the ground.  
  
"Hey," Robbie said, waiting until Travis looked at him. "He'll get over it. Give it time."  
  
Travis offered a small smile in return, and Lily tightened her arm around his waist, offering support emotionally as well as physically. Robbie nodded once more, then turned and headed down the sidewalk.  
  
"Come on, let's get you inside," she said, unlocking the door and holding it open for him.  
  
He limped inside, and she followed, locking the door behind them, and switching on the hall lights.  
  
"Think you can make it upstairs?" she asked, turning on the lights of the second floor as well.  
  
"Yeah," he nodded.   
  
"Okay. I'll meet you up there," she said. "I'm gonna get my mom's first aid kit."  
  
He nodded again, heading for the stairwell, gripping the banister with white knuckles.  
  
Lily watched for a moment to make sure he was okay, then headed to the downstairs bathroom to grab the huge white kit her mother had put together and stored under the sink. She opened it to check out the contents and, feeling confident that everything she needed was there, jogged up the steps to her room.  
  
Travis was standing in the middle of her room, staring out the window.  
  
"Hey, you should be sitting down," she said, tossing the kit on her bed.   
  
"I didn't want to mess up your bed," he said, waving a hand listlessly.   
  
"Don't worry about it," she said, frowning. "It's just a bedspread."  
  
He nodded, but made no move to sit.  
  
"Come on, Travis, cooperate with me," she pleaded, taking his arm. "Sit down."  
  
He let her lead him to the bed, pushing him down gently.   
  
"Hang on," she said, "I'll be right back."  
  
She disappeared and came back a minute later holding a large bowl filled with warm water, and a clean white rag in her arms.  
  
"'Kay," she said. "All set."  
  
She tried hard to ignore his creepy unblinking gaze as she dipped the towel in the water and gently tried to remove some of the blood from his face. She had to be extra careful around his cheek, she knew, because that would be extra painful. Still, she had to mop off enough of the dried blood to see how much gravel was stuck in there.  
  
"Okay," she said, looking at him closely. "This part might hurt...a lot. Feel free to...y'know, blink? Make any move that shows me you're still with me, Trav."  
  
He turned his gaze to hers, his intense eyes boring into hers for a moment, then returned to staring at the wall.  
  
"Okay..." she drew out, and set to using the tweezers to gently remove what gravel was stuck in his skin.   
  
Having accomplished the task in no time at all, she ran the towel gently over his cheek, taking off the rest of the dried blood, and what little had appeared while removing the stone.  
  
Ringing out the rag, she sat back on her heels. "You're gonna have to take off your shirt so I can look at your back."  
  
"No, it's fine," he said softly, still staring.  
  
"Travis, you're really scaring me," she admitted, watching him closely.  
  
"He had such...hatred in his eyes," Travis said so softly she had to strain to hear.  
  
"Ray?"  
  
"Yeah," he nodded.  
  
"He'll get over it," she said. "He had no right to do this to you. You didn't deserve it."  
  
"It's not just that," he said, sighing, and finally looking at her.  
  
"What, then?" she wanted to know.  
  
"I did deserve it," he said quickly. "I knew how much he cared for you, but I kissed you anyway."  
  
She wanted to talk, but sensed there was more, so she kept quiet.   
  
"When I kissed you...I didn't care how much liked you," Travis explained, his eyes radiating emotion. "Because I do, too. I care for you."  
  
"You...do?" she said in a small voice.  
  
"Yeah. I always have, I guess...when I met you, you didn't treat me like a freak. You saw me for who I was," he stated. "No one's ever really done that before."  
  
She sat, watching him quietly.  
  
"It's not just that, either. You're so...different from other people. You've got a beautiful soul," he said.  
  
That was so a Travis thing to say, that she began laughing.   
  
  
  
He knew that she wasn't laughing at him, and so he cracked a smile.  
  
"Travis, I really like you, too," she said. "And not just 'cause you've got a beautiful soul."  
  
He regarded her with a soft look, searching her.   
  
"I like you 'cause you're Travis. Utterly and totally you," she said, not caring if what she said didn't make sense. It made sense to her.   
  
His smile gradually faded. "I never told you because I knew how Ray felt about you. But today... I couldn't stop myself. You looked so beautiful, so pure... it didn't matter that he would hate me."  
  
"It doesn't," she amended. "I don't care if he's mad. He'll have to get over him. I had a crush on him before, but...it passed. It's nothing anymore. Not like...I just don't feel the same as he does."  
  
Travis only nodded.  
  
Feeling unsure, she cleared her throat. "Okay...so, um, your back. I need to clean that. Can you lay on your stomach?"  
  
He shifted positions, holding his shirt up so that she would have access to his lower back, and stretched out onto his stomach, wincing at the pressure it put on his ribs.  
  
She gently ran her fingers over the bruise starting to form there. "He really hurt you."  
  
"Don't hate him for it," Travis pleaded. "He wasn't thinking."  
  
"I don't know how you can not be mad at him," she said, shaking her head. "I am."  
  
He didn't answer, so Lily pulled her hair back in a ponytail and set to work on his back.   
  
Again, she had to clean off the old blood, and gently work with the tweezers, monotonously pulling out tiny pieces of gravel and tossing them in her trash can, applying the warm towel to the torn flesh afterwards.  
  
"How's your head?" she thought to ask. "You hit pretty hard...you're not dizzy or anything, are you?"  
  
"No," he said softly. "Not really."  
  
"Nausea? Double vision?" she kept at it.  
  
He laughed. "You're good at this nurse thing. You gonna follow in your Mom's footsteps?"  
  
She thought about it for a minute. "Nah. That's not for me."  
  
"Well, thanks for doing it," he said, sitting up carefully, wincing as his shirt rode over the scrapes.   
  
"Oh, no problem," she said, waving her arm. "All in a day's work."  
  
"No, I mean it," he said seriously. "Thank you."  
  
"Your welcome," she replied. "So, uh...what's your dad going to say about it?"  
  
Travis laughed again, but this time there was no humor in his voice. "Probably tell me a real man wouldn't have ended up in this situation. A real man would fight for his honor."  
  
She frowned.  
  
"I didn't have a reason to fight him," Travis said, shaking his head. "There would have been no honor in it."  
  
"Sounds like your dad's pretty tough," she reasoned.  
  
"Only sometimes," he shrugged. "You know how parents are."  
  
"Yeah," she agreed. "Speaking of which...mine are gonna be home soon."  
  
He took in her apologetic look and smiled. "I should be going anyway."  
  
"I'll walk you out," she said, getting to her feet and offering an arm to help hm up.  
  
He waved her arm away. "I'm okay now, I think. Thanks."  
  
She nodded, watching him closely as her rose, and then walked with him to the door, where she stood, still watching, as he left.  
  
"Think about what I said," he told her, turning as he stepped onto the porch. "About Ray."  
  
"I will," she promised softly, clutching the door frame.   
  
"Thank you," he said, reaching up a hand to tuck her hair behind her ear.  
  
And like that, Travis was gone, off the porch and vanishing into the night.  
  
Lily watched the darkness for a long time, eventually closing the front door and locking it behind her. She climbed the stairs to her room to clean up, putting away the first aid kit, tossing the towel in the laundry.   
  
In her room, sitting in the same spot Travis had just occupied, she picked up the phone. She dialed, but hung up before the second ring. Then dialed again, clutching the phone, forcing herself to listen to the rings, to not hang up.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
He sounded angry.  
  
"Ray...it's me," she said.  
  
"Oh..."  
  
"Please don't hang up!" she pleaded.  
  
"I wasn't gonna."  
  
"Oh. Okay. Look...about what happened..." she started.  
  
"Lily, don't," he said softly. "I know. You hate me, right?"  
  
"No," she said. "I just...I'm really angry, Ray."  
  
"I know," he sighed. "Look. I'm sorry, okay? But he knew how I felt, and he...he did what he did. I just couldn't help myself, you know? I was so mad!"  
  
"Like I am now?" she asked. "Only I'm not kicking your ass."  
  
"He could've fought back!" Ray protested. "He should have."  
  
"He didn't want to hurt you," Lily told him. "He knew why you did it. Would you believe he's not even mad at you for hurting him? He thinks he deserved it."  
  
"He did," Ray grumbled, but with less conviction.  
  
There was a pause.  
  
"How bad is he, anyway?" he asked softly.  
  
"Do you want to know so you can gloat, or because he's your friend?" she sneered.  
  
"I..."  
  
"He's pretty bad," she said, her tone holding none of the previous animosity. "You did a number on him."  
  
Silence. Then, "I didn't mean to hurt him so bad. I just...I felt so betrayed."  
  
"He felt really bad about doing it in the firs tplace, Ray, because he worried how it would hurt you," she said.  
  
"But he still did it!"  
  
"It's not exactly a one way street, Ray," Lily said in exasperation.   
  
"Lily...I've liked you for a really long time," Ray said, finally admitting it. "For a lot longer than we've even known Travis."  
  
"I get that, Ray," she said slowly. "But...you're too late."  
  
  
  
A sigh from the other end.  
  
"Do you like him, Lily? Really?" Ray said, sounding broken up.  
  
"Yeah," she said softly. "I do."  
  
He sighed again. "As long as you're happy, I guess."  
  
She smiled. "Thanks, Ray. But you're still not out of hot water with me."  
  
"Yeah, I figured," he said. "But as long as you're still my friend."  
  
"Of course," she said and rolled her eyes. "Good friends, but...no more."  
  
"I understand," he said, still sounding sad. "Tell Swami I'm sorry?"  
  
"Tell him yourself," Lily replied.  
  
"Right."  
  
"Goodnight, Ray," she responded.  
  
"'Night."  
  
She hung up, feeling only slightly better.  
  
Ray liked her. At one point, she might have felt the same way. At one point she thought she did. But what she felt was love, she had realized was only jealousy, and that tore her up inside. And then Travis...she really liked him, and he felt the same. Ray was still important to her, and she hated hurting him, but her heart would never be his.  
  
Lily sighed and flopped back on her bed.  
  
Life was complicated. 


	6. These Heights Are Dizzying

Okay, this is a bit longer than the rest, but I had a tonna fun writing it. Call me sappy, but I thought it was sweet, even with the lack of Smoggy goodness. ;)  
  
In response to the note that asked what the fic had to do with Travis being called crazy (come on, you wre all thinking it!), you'll have to wait and see. I'm slow developing on this one, but I hope it'll be worth it in the end. Stay tuned and it'll unfold soon! Remember, for every five reviews (or if I just get too antsy) you get a new chapter!  
  
*******  
  
  
  
Monday morning, Lily found herself back in the same situation with school. Overwhelming boredom, no Travis in the seat beside her, and time that seemed to pass at an impossibly slow rate. The stretch between first period and lunch, from 8am to 12pm, seemed to take at least twice as long as normal. It was all she could to stay awake, and when the bell finally rang for lunch, she had to resist jumping out of her chair and screaming in joy. Something told her teacher wouldn't appreciate that...   
  
She practically jogged to the cafeteria and made her way to the line, ducking in beside Robbie.  
  
"Is it just me," she started out, grabbing a tray, "or is this the longest day EVER?"  
  
Robbie laughed. "It is taking forever."  
  
Lily made a face as she grabbed a sandwich from the rack, placing it beside her already selected muffin. "And this is just gross."  
  
"You say that so often it's lost all meaning," he said sadly. "How come you never bring a lunch?"  
  
"Pure laziness," she replied simply as they paid for their purchases.  
  
She balanced her drink on the edge of the tray, making her way to an empty table.   
  
"Hey, have you heard from Travis?" Robbie mentioned as they sat. "He's not here today."  
  
"Yeah, I noticed," she replied, furrowing her brow. "And no, not a word."  
  
"Huh," he said thoughtfully. "Wonder what's up?"  
  
Lily just shook her head.  
  
"Can I sit here?" Ray's voice broke in.  
  
They looked up to see him standing with his tray, looking unsure.  
  
Robbie looked to Lily who said, "Of course."  
  
Ray looked around. "Hey, where's Swami? I wanted to...y'know..."  
  
Robbie and Lily sat with waiting looks.  
  
"Apologize," Ray sighed.  
  
"That's better," Lily said.   
  
"And he's not here today," Robbie added.   
  
Ray looked up from his sandwich. "He sick?"  
  
"We don't know?" Robbie answered.  
  
"I didn't hurt him that bad, did I?" Ray asked quickly, looking to his friends.  
  
"I don't think so," Lily said. "It wasn't pretty, but it wasn't that bad....unless he's avoiding you."  
  
"Travis doesn't seem like the avoiding kind, though, does he?" remarked Robbie.  
  
Lily took a gulp of her drink before answering. "No."  
  
There was a period of silence before Lily threw down her half eaten muffin. "Tell you what. I'm gonna duck into the Girl's room and try calling him. Feel free to scavenge my lunch, if you can stomach that stuff."  
  
Ray immediately snagged her untouched sandwich.  
  
"Right," she drew out. "Be right back."  
  
She grabbed her bag and headed to the cafeteria doors, then down the hallway a ways until she reached the nearest bathroom. She headed inside, pleased to find it empty, not full of the usual smoke and kids trying to get a cigarette in between classes. She immediately went for the last stall, shutting the door, but leaving it unlocked, leaning against it to keep it closed.   
  
She flipped open her cell and called up Travis's mobile number, hitting 'send'.  
  
She let it ring five times before clicking it off and trying his home number.  
  
Again, no answer.  
  
She sighed, staring hard at the wall, not seeing the graffiti, but thinking.  
  
Finally she headed back to the cafeteria, with minutes left in the period.  
  
"Well?" Robbie asked as she approached.  
  
She paused to watch Ray engulf the last fourth of her sandwich, then sat down. "Nothing."  
  
"Well, I'm sure it's nothing to worry about, right?"Robbie said, glancing at Ray.  
  
"Right," Ray answered, nodding. "Right?"  
  
Lily shrugged. "I dunno."  
  
The bell rang then, and all three looked up at the speakers before getting up.   
  
"Well, we'll probably see him after school, right?" Ray asked before they headed off to their separate classes.  
  
"Yeah," Robbie answered.   
  
Lily wasn't so sure.  
  
***  
  
Sure enough, when they headed to the warehouse for their afternoon show, Travis was nowhere to be seen.  
  
"Please tell me you know how to work that stuff," Ray pleaded to Robbie, who was staring into the tech booth.  
  
"Most of it," was the reply. "Enough to run the show, but..."  
  
"But? But's aren't good, unless they're J-Lo's," Ray said seriously.   
  
"But," Robbie replied, looking up at him. "It's not my area of expertise. I'd really prefer to have Travis back here."  
  
"Well, I think we're gonna have to make do without him," Lily said, shutting her cell phone yet again. "Because there's still no answer."  
  
Collective sighs met her ears.  
  
"Come on, guys, let's just do this," she said, feeling like sighing herself.  
  
5, 4, 3, 2...  
  
"This is Radio..."  
  
"...Free..."  
  
"Oops. Er, Roscoe!"  
  
***  
  
Lily adjusted her bag on her shoulder and sighed. Kicking a stone along the sidewalk as she headed for home. That show was definitely not the best they had done, but also not the worst. She wasn't sure if that was a good thing.  
  
Robbie knew the basics of the machinery back in the booth, though not as well as Travis, and he wasn't confident in his knowledge. Ray was...well, Ray. And Shady Lane could only help so much when her mind was really in other dimensions. Dimensions where Travis was sick or hurt, or... well, truthfully, she didn't know what she was thinking. But it wasn't good, she could tell that easily.  
  
They had gotten through the show, and she supposed that was what was important, not the quality...  
  
Still, she couldn't get her mind off of him...  
  
And so she altered her course, heading for Travis's house, calling to tell her Mom she'd be home late.   
  
Upon arriving at Travis's home, she rang the doorbell, waiting for a few moments.  
  
She glanced at the street and saw a sleek looking SUV parked in the proximity, so rang again.  
  
After another moment, a tall man in black slacks and a pristine shirt and conservative tie appeared at the door.  
  
"Yes?" he asked, holding the heavy door open with his foot.  
  
"Oh, uh, hi! I'm Lily Randal," she said, mentally kicking herself. She sounded like an idiot! "Is Travis in?"  
  
"Sorry, Lily," the man said kindly. "He went to a friend's house after school...Robbie I think he said."  
  
Lily furrowed her brow. "Okay, thanks. Maybe I'll head over there. Could you tell him I stopped by?"  
  
"No problem," Travis's father said, adjusting his tie. "I'm really in a rush, or I'd offer to drive you."  
  
"No problem," she echoed. "Have a nice evening!"  
  
"Well, you too," he said, sounding surprised by her politeness.   
  
"Bye," she called over her shoulder as she hurried down the porch steps.  
  
She waited until she was a few feet away before calling Robbie on her cell.  
  
"Hello?" his voice said from the other line.  
  
"Hey, Robbie...any word from Travis?" she asked.  
  
"Nope," he said. "And Ray's over here, though I doubt Trav would call him."  
  
"Hmm," she murmured, choosing to keep her newfound information to herself. "Okay. Well, he'll probably be in first period tomorrow, so I'll see you then."  
  
"Right," Robbie said. "Later."  
  
"Bye."  
  
She thought over Travis's favorite spots. Mickey's, the book store, the thrift shops they loved to scour...the observation deck...  
  
"That's it!" she cried, looking up at the sky.   
  
It was a clear night, no cloud cover whatsoever, and Travis loved nights like this. Many times he had tried to drag her or Robbie, or Audrey, before they broke up, out to watch the stars after dark.   
  
It was a long shot, but something told her it might be right.  
  
***  
  
Set on the side of a dark hill by the edge of town, the Roscoe Observation Deck rose high into the air, stuck and cemented into the ground and bolted into rock wall of the incline. It resembled a fire tower in nature, with it's height, and the crisscross of beams supporting it. At the top, the deck that gave it it's name was surrounded by thick railing, a little over waist-high. A set of switchback stairs ran under the deck, leading to a trapdoor that led to the deck itself.   
  
Lil had stopped at home half an hour earlier, telling her mother she was going to be at Audrey's studying until late, then grabbed a flashlight and high-tailed it here. Now she took the stairs two at a time, both anxious to get out of the creepy woods and anxious to find out if Travis really was up there.   
  
As she reached the final stretch, she turned off the flashlight, one hand tightly gripping the railing, and reached up to push open the trapdoor. It opened rather soundlessly, but clanked heavily against the wooden floor.  
  
She cringed at the noise but climbed through.  
  
Standing on the deck, feeling a slight attack of vertigo, she took in a deep breath. Steadied, she reached down to close the trapdoor, lest she fall through.  
  
She had a feeling that if someone was there, they would have called out by now, but she still took out her flashlight, turning the beam on.  
  
She shone the light around the deck, establishing a sense of space, and moved quickly away from the railing.  
  
"Hello?" she tried.  
  
Silence.   
  
Then, "Lily?"  
  
A voice, slightly hoarse, but easily identified.  
  
She swung the beam low, against the rock wall.  
  
"Travis!"  
  
If he heard the relief in her voice, he did not react. He remained sitting against the wall, knees drawn up to his chest, arms locked around them. He wore the same light jacket as he did on Saturday, and his jeans were dirty, a hole torn in the right knee. He looked terrible.  
  
"Travis, what the hell?" she asked, hurrying over to him.  
  
He flinched as he knelt down, but didn't shield his eyes from the light.  
  
"What're you doing up here?" he asked as she lowered the beam.  
  
"Looking for you, and planning on asking that very question," she said, setting the flashlight down on one end, spilling light over her now as well and scooting closer to him..  
  
Travis merely shrugged. "Did you come here by yourself? Something could have happened to you."  
  
"As charming as the concern is," she said, slightly angry, "I'd really rather know where you were all day."  
  
Again, a shrug. But this time he followed it up. "I was nowhere for a while. Then I came here. It got dark, and I didn't have a light, and I didn't want to try climbing down and finding my way back in the dark."  
  
"So you were instead content to sleep up here?" she asked, raising her eyebrows. "Your dad would have freaked out. I did freak out."  
  
"Dad wouldn't have noticed," Travis shook his head. "He's got a thing tonight."  
  
"Okay, well, still," Lily said. "It was incredibly stupid."  
  
He actually smiled at that. "Yeah..."  
  
She sat for a moment. "Well, I've got a light, so we can go now."  
  
"Look at the stars, Lily," he said instead, nodding his chin upward.  
  
It was not her first time there, yet she was a bit stunned as she gazed up. The stars seemed unusually bright, none of the light actually reaching them, but stretching out in vast points of white and yellow light.  
  
"Wow," she said. "Twinkle, twinkle little star..."  
  
"Stars don't actually twinkle," Travis said offhandedly. "It's because they're so far away. Some of their light gets absorbed by our atmosphere. The air moving around makes it look like it's glimmering."  
  
Lily paused to look at him. "That's kinda depressing."  
  
"Yeah," he said. "It is."  
  
"I prefer to think they twinkle just 'cause," she said. "Like magic."  
  
She was aware of him staring at her then.   
  
"See," he said, shaking his head and grinning. "That's what I like about you."  
  
Lily blushed. "Really?"  
  
He chuckled a bit, wrapped an arm around her, then leaned over, kissing her lightly on the lips. "Really."  
  
More blushing on her part, and Lily was glad that the little light from the flashlight couldn't give that away.  
  
They stayed that way for a while, sharing warmth, watching the sky, and then, much to Travis's dismay, Lily said they should go.  
  
And they did. 


	7. Phone Calls From Further Away

Hmmm...new chapter. Got very few revies on the last one. Not sure if it was bad, or you just didn't like it, or no one read it, or you just didn't review...oops, obsessing again! Anyway, here's the newest chapter, and ....REVIEW IT! :P  
  
***  
  
"Okay, guys, poll!" Lily said, leaning back in her chair in the RFR studio. "Friday night. The week's over, but the weekend's not quite here."  
  
"How's that a poll?" Ray asked, looking up from the paper he was scribbling on.  
  
"If you'd let me finish," Lily said jovially. "The poll: What are we doing tonight?"  
  
"Movie?" Robbie suggested, shrugging.  
  
"Anything good out?" Lily started. "And before you answer, I mean something worth seeing."  
  
Ray, who had been about to say something, shut his mouth.  
  
"Mickey's?" Robbie tried again.  
  
He was met with "nah's" from both Lily and Ray.  
  
"Fine, geez," Robbie said with a laugh. "Picky, picky. Travis?"  
  
From the tech booth, he looked up. "Hmm?"  
  
"Any ideas?" Robbie repeated.  
  
"On..?" came the reply.  
  
"Us. Doing things. Tonight," Ray briefed him. He'd made up with Travis, and though things were still tense, it was getting back to normal.  
  
"Oh. I dunno," he replied.  
  
  
  
The last song of the show was nearing an end.   
  
"Bowling?" Ray suggested, making a face.  
  
  
  
"Nah," Lily said. "Robbie?"  
  
"I agree," he laughed.  
  
As the song ended, and as Travis shut down the equipment, they still could not come up with a decision.  
  
"I guess we could always just hang at my place until we figure out what to do," Lily said. "Maybe we could order in pizza and get some movies off the TV or something."  
  
"Hey, yeah," Ray said. "We haven't done that forever."  
  
"I'm in," Robbie said. "I'll even bring the sugary goodness that is Coke."  
  
"No, Pepsi," Lily amended with a shake of her head.   
  
"Vanilla," Ray added.   
  
  
  
"Cherry," Lily followed, making a face. "Ugh."  
  
"Right," Robbie broke in. "So, one Vanilla, one Cherry. Travis, anything you want?"  
  
Exiting the tech booth, Travis shook his head. "I'm not really a fan of soda."  
  
"Freaaaak," Ray sing songed.  
  
"That's me," Travis said with a wink.  
  
"Man. Are we gonna have to argue over toppings, too?" Lily moaned exaggeratedly.   
  
"Pepperoni!" Robbie chimed in.  
  
"Isn't there a rule against Buddhists eating meat?" Ray directed towards Travis.  
  
"Some," he replied, shoving things in his bag. "Not all."  
  
"You?" Robbie inquired.  
  
"Pepperoni's fine," he chuckled.  
  
"Lily?" Ray said. "You gonna make this easy, or we takin' the hard way?"  
  
"Pepperoni's good," she echoed Travis, cringing. "Just don't hurt me!"  
  
"Good deal," he grinned.  
  
"Okay, what say we meet at...seven?" Lily asked. "That good for everyone?"  
  
A chorus of affirmative answers met her ears.  
  
"Good. In that case, I gotta get home and try to shoe my mom out for the night," Lily laughed, grabbing her bag. "See ya!"  
  
They said their goodbyes in return.  
  
"So, are you two an item yet?" Robbie asked once she was gone.  
  
Travis's eyes immediately went to Ray, who held up his hands in defense.  
  
"Hey, I'm cool...I guess," he said. "But hurt her, and you're dead meat."  
  
Travis half-smiled. "Thanks, I think. But no, we're not an...item."  
  
"You should ask her out," Robbie said, winking.  
  
Travis laughed at that.   
  
  
  
"What?" he wanted to know.  
  
"Nothin'," Travis replied, still chuckling.  
  
"Hey, word of advice," Ray offered as he moved to the door. "Don't wait too long...she might move on."  
  
He pulled the door open to leave, but Travis stopped him, saying, "Ray."  
  
His friend looked back, eyebrows raised.  
  
"You sure you're okay with this?" Travis asked.  
  
  
  
"Not quite yet," Ray said in a moment of seriousness. "I'm getting there."  
  
With that, he was gone, leaving Robbie and Travis alone.  
  
"Well...that's good, right?" Robbie laughed.  
  
Travis shook his head, smirking.  
  
***  
  
Four hours later, in the plush basement of the Randall house, the four teens were crammed together on the leather couch, seated in front of the TV, two half eaten pizzas and several bottles of soda spread out on the coffee table beside them. Ray and Robbie were whispering lines for the characters and laughing at the funnier ones, while Lily and Travis watched silently. Lily's head rested against his shoulder in a friendly manner, and he appeared not to notice.  
  
Breaking the silence suddenly, a cell phone began to ring.  
  
The others looked around while Travis jumped up.  
  
"Be right back."  
  
He disappeared up the stairs, muttering, "Hello?"  
  
"I'm going to put the pizza away, want anything?" Lily said, standing and gathering the boxes.  
  
"No," Robbie replied, laughing at something Ray had just said.  
  
"Oookay," Lily said, taking the pizza with her upstairs.  
  
She headed for the kitchen, noticing Travis standing in the hallway, and grabbed the aluminum foil to wrap the food in. As she stacked pizza, she tried to tell herself she wasn't eavesdropping. It was just that Travis had seemed so anxious at that call...  
  
"No...I know I told you I'd be there by now!" she heard Travis say, sounding frustrated.   
  
"I know...I know...dammit, I said I know that already!"  
  
At this outburst, Lily's eyes widened. Travis hardly ever cursed. Come to think of it, she didn't think she had ever heard him utter a profanity.   
  
After a moments pause, Travis replied in a much calmer voice, "I'm sorry. No, I didn't mean it...yeah. Sorry.."  
  
Who was he talking to?  
  
"I'm at a friend's house," he continued with a sigh. "No, it's not a girl, it's a bunch of us."  
  
Hmmm..  
  
"Look, I gotta go," he said. "No, I'm gonna go. No! God, I'll call you later," he said bitterly, and from the beep she guessed he's hung up.  
  
He walked past and spotted her in the kitchen.  
  
"Hey," he said, standing on the other side of the island where she wrapped the rest of the pizza. "Was I being loud?"  
  
From his look she shook her head, "You mean was I listening?"  
  
"How could you not have been?" he scoffed. "Sorry about that."  
  
"Who was it?" she asked curiously. "I mean, not that I was listening."  
  
Travis cracked a smile. "Uh, my Dad. I kinda told him I'd be home earlier. Also that I was studying. I don't think I'm so good at lying."  
  
"What, doesn't he want you hanging out with me?" she joked,  
  
"No," he said quickly. "He thinks you're 'charming'. He's just upset because I brought home my first F on that math quiz."  
  
"YOU got an F?" she cried.  
  
"Hey, tell the whole world," he laughed. "Yeah. I forgot to study. It's only one test."  
  
Lily shook it off. "You're right. It's just...unlike you."  
  
"Yeah..." he was cut off as the phone rang again. "Ugh. Hello?"  
  
Lily turned away, putting the pizza in the fridge.  
  
"Fine! God," Travis said angrily, hanging up.   
  
"Lily, I gotta go," he said. "He's freaking out."  
  
"Oh, that's okay," she said, disappointedly.   
  
"I don't want to," he assured her.   
  
"I get it," she said. "Parents are...parents."  
  
"Yeah..." he agreed. Then, "Hey, Lily?"  
  
"That's me."  
  
"You wanna go out with me tomorrow?" he said in a rush.  
  
  
  
"Like...a real date?" she asked.  
  
  
  
"Yeah," he nodded.  
  
"I'd love to," she grinned.   
  
"Good," he smiled back. "I'll call you in the afternoon so we can set something up, okay?"  
  
"Sure," she said.  
  
He leaned down and kissed her on the cheek.  
  
"Until then," he said, walking toward the door.  
  
"Yeah..." she said, watching him, blushing.  
  
He disappeared, and a moment later, she realized he had left his cell-phone sitting on the counter where he'd angrily dropped it.  
  
She grabbed it up and ran for the front door, stepping into the street. There, at the end of the block, was Travis.  
  
She was about to call out when a car stopped next to him. He opened the door and got in, shutting it behind him.  
  
Lily froze.   
  
In the driver's seat, a girl with long, light colored hair. She reached over to give him a hug, and he returned it. A split second later, the car took off again. 


	8. Does He Ever Get the Girl?

Okay, so I'm an evil bitch. You'll find out soon. Annnyhoo...I've had this in mind since the beginning, and it's juuust starting to come into play. In this chapter: an explanation! Just who was that in the car? Anyone guess it yet? :D Oh, and leave me reviews! I won't update this until I get at least five more...and you all know I'm probably lying, don't you? Okay, I'd LIKE five reviews...I'll update whenever I get antsy and creative. Enjoooy!  
  
***  
  
Lily stood in front of her mirror, staring critically at her reflection in the mirror. It was late afternoon, and she and Travis had agreed to get going around five so they would have time to grab dinner before their movie started. Her hair was cooperating, no unruly frizzies or knots. Her khaki cargo pants and dark green T-shirt were suitable for almost every restaurant in town.  
  
All in all, she was good to go.  
  
Only, she wasn't.   
  
She sighed, running her brush through her hair one last time, then tossed it on the dresser.   
  
Her mind was still on the previous night. Travis saying he had to go home because his dad was upset...then getting in a strange car with a strange girl, and hugging her.   
  
Flopping on her bed, she ran over the possibilities. A friend? A cousin! Or was it that he was cheating on her?   
  
"This is stupid," Lily complained out loud. "He can't be cheating on me...we're not even going out!"  
  
Minutes later the doorbell rang, forcing her out of her reverie. She grabbed her jacket and gave one last look toward the mirror, then rushed down the stairs and opened the door.  
  
"Hey," Travis said, smiling from the other side of the threshold.   
  
"Hey," she replied with her own smile.  
  
  
  
"Ready to go?" he asked. "Dad let me borrow his car."  
  
"Yeah," she replied, shutting the door and pausing to lock it. "So we're riding in style?"  
  
"If you call a gas-guzzling monster style, yeah," he said, motioning toward the black SUV his father usually drove.   
  
"Well, it is shiny and new," she shrugged.  
  
He laughed, leading her down the walkway to the car. He surprised her by opening the door for her.  
  
"Chivalry really isn't dead," she said, climbing in.  
  
He walked around the front of the car and got in, turning the keys in the ignition.  
  
Once they were driving, Lily reached over to turn the radio on, keeping the volume low, but enough to fill the awkward silence. She didn't know what to say, if anything, or if she should wait for Travis to speak, but that seemed unlikely, and it was driving her crazy. So instead, they listened to the radio.  
  
They had decided on the phone earlier that day to eat at Angelo's, an Italian restaurant near the movie theater. It wasn't too fancy, but the food was good, and the price was in their range, so it seemed the perfect choice.  
  
Fortunately it was also only ten minutes away from Lily's house, so their silence didn't get too out of control.  
  
"I didn't mention it before," he said after they had parked and gotten out of the SUV. "You look really nice tonight."  
  
"Oh, these old thangs?" she said in a cheesy Southern accent.  
  
He smirked at her, and she felt even worse.  
  
"But thanks," she added as they headed toward the front door.  
  
Inside a maitre d led them to a cozy looking booth near the back of the restaurant, which wasn't too busy for a Saturday night, and handed them two menus.  
  
"Thanks," Lily said brightly, waving as the man walked away.  
  
Travis laughed, watching the waiter glance back with an odd look on his serious face.  
  
Minutes later their waiter appeared, a middle-aged man with half a head of hair and a cheesy twisty mustache.   
  
"Hello," he said, completing the look with a cheesy Italian accent. "I am Vincenzo, and I will be your waiter this evening. May I take your order?"  
  
"Uhh..." Lily said, mouth open.  
  
"I'll..have the Chicken Parmesan," Travis said, eyes narrowed and trying to contain his own laughter.   
  
"And to drink?" Vincenzo asked, pencil poised over his pad of paper.  
  
"Just water," Travis replied, turning his attention to Lily and giving her a look.  
  
She was still staring as she ordered. "Fettuccini Alfredo, please...with Coke..."  
  
"Thank you!" he said enthusiastically. "I will return momentarily with your beverages!"  
  
"Wow...he was...a character?" Travis said, looking at Lily.  
  
"He...was..." she replied, biting down on her lip.  
  
Seconds later they gave in, letting out their uncontrollable laughter.   
  
"That is so obviously an act!" she whispered, leaning in so he could hear her.  
  
"I think the mustache is glued on," Travis agreed. "You can see the glue if you look really hard."  
  
"And that accent?" she said. "Please!"  
  
They both sat up straight as Vincenzo suddenly appeared with two glasses.   
  
"For the monsieur," he said, setting the Coke in from of Travis. "And for the madam!"  
  
Lily glanced down at the water, then back up at Vincenzo as he walked away. "Isn't monsieur French?"  
  
They switched drinks, laughing.  
  
"Travis," she started, wanting to get this out when the mood was light. "I saw you last night..."  
  
"Uh, yeah," he said, furrowing his brow. "I was at your house."  
  
"No," she waved her hand. "I mean after. After you left."  
  
  
  
If he knew what she meant, he gave no sign. "And what did you see?"  
  
"I saw you get into a car, which wasn't your Dad's," she said, biting her lip. "I saw you with a girl, who...wasn't your Dad."  
  
"I should hope not," he chuckled.  
  
At her serious look, he quieted and sighed. "What do you want me to tell you?"  
  
She shrugged, then said, "Just tell me I'm not on a date with a guy who already has a girlfriend."  
  
He shook his head. "You're not."  
  
"So, who was she?" she said, chewing on her straw as she sipped her Coke.  
  
"It's complicated," was all he offered, staring down at his water glass.  
  
"Complicated how?" she asked, careful to keep her voice low. "You hugged her, right? You don't hug strangers, you hug people you care about."  
  
Travis looked up then, shutting his eyes for a moment, then looking deeply into hers. After letting out another sigh, he said, "She's my mother."  
  
"Your mother?" Lily repeated.  
  
"Yeah," he said, dropping his gaze.  
  
"Wait," she said. "I don't get it. I thought your mom was...I didn't think you had a mother."  
  
"I'm not supposed to see her," Travis said softly, swirling his straw in his drink.  
  
"What?" Lily asked, confused. "Why not?"  
  
"A lot of different reasons, I guess," he said, shrugging. "My dad got sole custody after the divorce. That was a long time ago. But she kept seeing me...on weekends or whatever. Then we moved here, and dad forbade her to see me."  
  
"That's harsh...why would he do that?" she asked, not getting it.  
  
"I dunno," Travis said absently. "She showed up a few weeks ago. Got an apartment across town."  
  
"Well, that's good," she said. "Isn't it?"  
  
"Yeah," he answered sounding unsure. "It's just...Dad can't find out. He wouldn't like it."  
  
Lily frowned.  
  
"I had to drop karate classes to see her," he said, picking at his napkin, trying to pull a thread free from the cloth. "It's the only my Dad wouldn't start to wonder. I was supposed to see her last night, but I lost track of time. She wanted to spend some time with me before the weekend."  
  
"Your dad wouldn't even let you see her once a week?" Lily asked, still not getting why a father wouldn't let his son see his mother.  
  
"No, he's really adamant about it," he said, shrugging. "Dad's weird about that."  
  
"So, wait," she said, something dawning on her. "You were lying about karate...how'd you get that bruise? That bloody nose?"  
  
Travis looked up then, his lips twisting into a frown. "Mom got herself a boyfriend...he wasn't a classy guy."  
  
"He hit you?" she practically cried.  
  
"Shh!" he calmed her. "No, he didn't hit me. Well, he did. But I hit him first."  
  
Travis never hit anyone first, Lily thought, frowning.  
  
"He was an ass," Travis said, his words dripping acid. "She can do better. I guess she knew it, because she dumped him. He wouldn't leave her alone, so I made the message clear."  
  
She didn't know whether to think of it as heroic, or frightening.  
  
"Anyway," he said. "There's no other girl in the picture."  
  
Lily blushed slightly, smiling. "Good."  
  
Vincenzo reappeared then, carrying their plates, piled high with food.  
  
"Enjoy your meal!" he said, setting the plates down. "I will get you more beverages."  
  
Travis and Lily looked down, laughed, and switched plates.  
  
***  
  
They decided to forge the movie after dinner was through, instead retiring to the car, putting on a CD, and driving aimlessly. Most of the back roads out of town looped around and lead back in, making them good for long drives without actually getting too far away.  
  
"Thanks," lily said suddenly, breaking the silence, comfortable this time.  
  
"For what?" Travis asked, his eyes leaving the road for a moment.  
  
"Tonight."   
  
"You're welcome," he replied with a laugh. "I should be thanking you."  
  
"Why?" she asked, cocking her head to one side.  
  
"For saying yes," he grinned.  
  
She rolled her eyes with a smile and sat back in her seat.   
  
"This is good," she said contentedly.  
  
"What is?" he asked, looking over at her again.  
  
"This," she said, taking a deep breathe. "The music, the ride, you."  
  
He smiled, going back to watching the road.  
  
"Oh, I love this song!" she cried, reaching over to turn the volume up.  
  
He laughed as she began singing along, dancing as much as her seatbelt would allow.  
  
"You're definitely one of a kind," he said, shaking his head with a smile.  
  
"Thanks," she said, bobbing her head, laughing.  
  
A flash of brown caught her eye, and she screamed, "Watch out!"  
  
A deer jumped from the side of the road, darting across, panicking, and stopping in the proverbial 'caught in the headlights' position.   
  
At her scream, Travis's eyes widened, and he slammed on the brakes, swerving to avoid hitting Mr. Deer.  
  
There was a brief moment of total and complete silence, even with the CD player still going, and then they hit. 


	9. So Long Sweet Slumber

BIG thanks to Mark for helpin' me out with some of the more...medical aspects of this. I truly am inferior! It probably helps that he's been an EMT for how long, though, right? Anyhoo, this isn't as exciting as the last, and some of you will probably hate me, but hey, that's the way the cookie crumbles! :) Things are gonna be reveiled in the upcoming chapters, so it should be getting more fun...enjoy...leave me lotsa reviews like last time and I'll make it worth your while!!  
  
***  
  
"Seventeen year old male suffering from head trauma, possible chest injuries," a voice shouted from the darkness, methodic and strong amidst the fog. "We're gonna need a C-spine and some O2 here."  
  
The voice sounded close, but far away at the same time.  
  
"Seventeen year old female, light head trauma, regaining consciousness," another voice called, closer than the last. "Honey, can you hear me?"  
  
Lily fought to open her eyes, grateful that they seemed to be ready to stop resisting.   
  
"She's awake!" the voice called as a light shone in her eyes. "Pupils are equal and responsive. Possible fracture to the left radius."  
  
Lily squinted away from the penlight the unfamiliar man was shining at her face. Her head was killing her, and she just wanted to close her eyes and regain her composure.   
  
"My name's Murphy," the man before her said, his breath fogging in the chilly air. "Can you tell me your name?"  
  
"Lily Randall ," she croaked, trying to figure out why this strange man was standing over her.  
  
Last she remembered she and Travis were driving, and...  
  
"Travis!" she cried out, bolting upright and wincing.  
  
"Whoa, now, lay back," Murphy said, lacing gentle hands on her shoulders. "We gotta get a collar on you, se how bad you're hurt."  
  
"Hurt?" she mumbled, looking up with scared eyes. "But, Travis -"  
  
  
  
"That your friend's name?" Murphy asked casually, strapping a C collar securely around her neck, focusing on his work.   
  
  
  
Lily tried to nod, but the collar held her neck perfectly still. "Is he okay?"  
  
"Let's focus on you right now, kiddo," Murphy said kindly, bending over to work below her line of sight.  
  
"No!" she cried. "Travis!"  
  
"Don't get excited," he said. "Your pal's doing okay."  
  
Lily, disbelieving, rolled her eyes to her right, straining to see.   
  
Travis wasn't in the seat, and for a moment her heart leapt into her throat. But upon further inspection, she could see why he was missing.  
  
The paramedics had removed him from the seat and strapped him onto a backboard, his head secured in blocks, to make sure that if he was injured he could do no movement that would aggravate them, and worsen his state. There was an oxygen mask covering his mouth and nose, a heavy trail of blood leading from the side of his head down the side of his neck.   
  
"Travis?" she said quietly.  
  
"Don't let the blood scare you," Murphy said softly as he and another paramedic maneuvered her out of the car and lay her gently on a stretcher. "Head wounds might bleed a lot, but they're often not as serious as they look."  
  
Lily shut her eyes tightly as the men strapped her in and felt the gentle motion as they wheeled it over to the ambulance. As they prepared to lift the stretcher into the vehicle, Lily allowed herself a look at the SUV they had been riding in.   
  
The front end was wrapped around a wide tree, one headlight broken, and harmless pieces of safety glass from the broken windshield littered the pavement. The rest of the vehicle appeared untouched, aside from the doors hanging open, and it contrasted dramatically with the crushed front.   
  
Lily whimpered, not out of pain, but out of the reality of the situation. They should have been killed... Travis was hurt, she hurt all over.  
  
"Next time," Murphy said conversationally, climbing in next to her as his partner slammed the doors shut, "tell him to hit the deer."  
  
"I don't know if he could," she smiled weakly. "He's a Buddhist."  
  
Murphy smiled back, glad to see that the girl felt good enough to be joking with him.  
  
"Where is Travis?" she asked, her eyes roaming around the interior.  
  
"Headed the same place we are," he said briskly. "How does your arm feel?"  
  
"My arm?" she asked, and as she did, she grew aware of a dull throbbing in her left arm. "It hurts a little."  
  
"Well, it might be broken," he said, rustling through a medical bag. "You're going to have to get some X-Rays at the hospital, nothing major."  
  
As he spoke, Murphy was applying a splint to the arm, which made the pain grow worse, and made Lily more aware of that pain.  
  
"What about Travis?" she wanted to know, though.  
  
"I don't know," the paramedic finally sighed.   
  
Lily felt tears spring to her eyes. Whether it was the ever growing pain in her arm, or the uncertain fate of her friend, she couldn't decide.  
  
***  
  
Lily was tired, and mad, and worried all at once.   
  
Tired because she had spent the last hour being shifted from a hallway to a rook, where her mom met her, tearful and anxious having heard the news in the middle of her shift, to the X-ray table, back to another room.  
  
Mad because they kept poking her injured arm, kept telling her to hold still, keep it in a painful position so they could get the right angle on an X-ray.   
  
Worried because no matter how many times she asked, no one would tell her about Travis.  
  
She wanted to go home.  
  
"Mom," she pleaded as her mother paced around the room in her scrubs. "You work here. Can't you make them tell you something?"  
  
"Lily, honey, I'm sorry. I'll ask again once we get your results, but right now I'm more worried about my own child," her mother said, stopping at the foot of her bed.  
  
"Miss Randall?" the doctor asked, appearing at the door with a knock on the frame. "I'm Dr. Gary."  
  
"Hi," Lily said sullenly, glaring.  
  
"Well," he said, placing her X-rays on the light on the wall. "It looks like you've got very minor stress fracture here. This is only a wet reading, so we'll have to sent the X-rays off to your doctor, have him look over it, make sure nothing more shows up. For now, we'll get you in a cast and you should be fine in a month or so."  
  
Lily glared down at the splint on her arm.  
  
"As for that head," the doctor said, "It's nothing to be worried about, but we would like to keep you overnight. Just as a safety measure."  
  
This caught Lily's attention. "What? No!"  
  
Her mother caught her frightened look. "It's okay, Lil...she's scared of hospitals."  
  
"Am not!" Lily protested. "They're just...creepy."  
  
Dr. Gary chuckled. "Well, don't you worry, we haven't lost a patient yet. We'll get someone in here right away to get that cast on."  
  
"Wait!" Lily called as he started to leave. "My friend! Travis Strong, is he okay?"  
  
Mrs Randall sighed. "I'll go get Marcy to get the supplies."  
  
"Okay," Dr Gary said, watching her go.  
  
"Well?" Lily demanded.   
  
"I'm not at liberty to discuss his condition with anyone other than his parents or guardians," Dr. Gary said. "You should know that."  
  
"I don't want you to discuss him with me," Lily cried. "Just tell me if he's okay!"  
  
The doctor sighed. "He's alive. He's in good condition."  
  
Lily let out a sigh of relief.   
  
Dr. Gary turned to leave, then seemed to rethink it, turning around to face her. "You might want to talk to him when you get a chance."  
  
Lily's face screwed up. "I always talk to him..."  
  
"Talk to him," the doctor asked. "Ask him about - "  
  
Before he could finish, Lily's mother and another woman walked in, carrying equipment, which they set on the edge of Lily's bed.  
  
"I'll be back to check on you," Dr. Gary said, leaving Lily open-mouthed and a bit angry.  
  
"Okay, let's see that arm," the woman, Marcy said cheerfully.  
  
She gently removed the velcro straps of the splint and checked her arm.   
  
"I think the swelling's gone down as much as it's going to," she said. "Try to hold your arm still, even if it hurts."  
  
Lily complied, holding her arm out, gritting her teeth as the pain increased.  
  
"Your mom told me you liked purple," Marcy said, turning around with cotton and rolls of purple material in her hands.  
  
Her mother grabbed her arm at the elbow, helping her to keep it up while decreasing the pain only slightly. Marcy applied a layer of cotton to her arm and quickly went to work dipping the rolls of fiberglass in water and wrapping them around the cotton.  
  
"'Kay," Marcy said, finishing the roll of purple fiberglass. "Now, you're going to feel it get warm, and then it's going to get really hard."  
  
Lily nodded, still clenching her jaw.  
  
Marcy brought over two pillows and her mother gently let Lily's arm rest on them.  
  
"Now, you're going to need to keep it elevated for at least 24 hours," Marcy said, producing a sling. "Keep it on the pillows tonight, and wear this sling for a while."  
  
Lily nodded, and kept nodding as Marcy went through the do's and don't's of wearing a cast. Do tell if your fingers turn blue or get numb, don't get it wet or rest it on a sharp surface, blah, blah, blah.  
  
Lily thought she might scream in joy when they finally left her alone, even if it did mean that her long night in the hospital was about to begin. Her mother promised to stop in whenever she could as she finished her shift, and Lily was grateful.  
  
***  
  
The ibuprofen they had given her before did only so much to take away the pain, and it was keeping Lily awake. She wanted to sleep through the night, lessen the time she was actually aware of being stuck there, but so far, it wasn't happening.  
  
Her face set in grim determination, Lily threw back the blankets and sat on the side of the bed, letting her head clear for a moment. She grabbed the sling and maneuvered it over her head with one arm, letting is come to rest across her chest and gently easing her arm inside.  
  
She stood up, sucking in a breath as her bare feet hit the chilly linoleum. Cool air hit her back, bringing goose bumps to the area above the thin cotton pants and below where the gown was tied off. She shivered, and moved on.  
  
Her plan made sense in her mind. Find Travis.  
  
That was it.  
  
In reality, it proved more difficult. She couldn't very well go and ask where Travis was. They would only make her go back to bed.  
  
Lily sighed, peering around the door, checking that no pesky people were hanging in the hallway, ready to catch her in the act.  
  
She crept out into the hall, her arm throbbing with renewed pain.  
  
So Lily started the long, arduous, and probably illegal task of walking down the hallway, peering into room after room, looking for her friend. It was only after two old men, one woman with both legs in traction, a man coughing up something unpleasant that she found the right room.  
  
She could make out Travis's form beneath the thin blankets, could see his face in the dim light spilling out of the open bathroom.   
  
"Travis," she whispered, entering the room.  
  
The cut that had bled so profusely before was neatly stitched and covered in gauze, surrounded by a light bruise. His left arm was secured in a splint much like the one she had recently had removed, and was tucked against his chest in a protective manner. His eyes were closed.   
  
"Travis?" she tried again, taking another step closer.  
  
That was when she saw...  
  
She heard the doctor in her memory, telling her to ask him about something he didn't get the chance to explain.   
  
She knew what he meant when she saw Travis's arm.  
  
  
  
His right arm, the uninjured one, was covered in cuts. Some were healing, some fading into old scars, but the combination was shocking. These were not accidental. They were neat and precise, lined up and executed with intent.  
  
He hadn't told her everything. 


	10. These Cuts Are Leaving Creases

Here it is, the next part! I'll be away until Friday, so no updates until then. I'm going to be in New Orleans for Mardi Gras. Revies are the fuel to get me writign as soon as I return! ;)  
  
***  
  
To say that Lily was relieved when she was released from the hospital the next morning would be an understatement. Overjoyed comes closer. Ecstatic might just fit. Despite her happiness, her stomach was knotted with dread.  
  
  
  
The scene from Travis's hospital room replayed in her head over and over. She had left the room as quietly as she had entered, her face a mask of confusion and hurt. She returned to her room, climbed beneath the covers, and sat there well into the night before falling asleep. Even still, she could not escape thoughts of Travis.  
  
What would possess someone to do that?  
  
She had heard of self-injury before, briefly, in a seminar in school once after a kid in their grade had attempted suicide. That, along with depression, eating disorders, and drug abuse, had been mentioned, but not really discussed. She thought back, trying to remember what the counselor had said, but nothing came to mind.   
  
Halfway down the hallway, with her mother in the lead, Lily stopped. "Mom? Can you wait in the car for a couple of minutes?"  
  
"What's wrong?" her mom asked, turning around. "I thought you'd be jumping to get home."  
  
"Yeah," Lily said, fiddling with the strap of her sling. "I just wanna see Travis."  
  
"Okay," her mother relented after a moments hesitation. "Don't be too long."  
  
Lily nodded and headed off in the other direction.   
  
Reaching Travis's room, she went to open the door, but held off when she heard voices inside. Pausing with one hand on the door handle, Lily leaned in, eavesdropping.  
  
"Mr. Strong...we've had your son's medical records faxed over," she heard a voice say...Dr. Gary, if she wasn't mistaken.  
  
She heard another man, Travis's dad she guessed, answer with a tired sigh.  
  
"And?"   
  
"There are some very interesting aspects here," the doctor said. "Left arm broken...three times? Most likely why it was broken in this crash when most of the force was toward his right side... Broken ribs, fingers..."  
  
  
  
"Travis participates in a particularly rough class of martial arts," Mr. Strong said. "Unfortunately there's not much I can do about it."  
  
"The reason I bring this up," Dr. Gary continued as if he had never been interrupted. "Is that these sorts of injuries, and the fact that they are so common...are conducive with abuse."  
  
"I do not abuse my son," Mr Strong said, sounding angry now.  
  
There was silence.  
  
  
  
"Mr Strong...."  
  
"It was his mother."  
  
Lily frowned, pressing her ear to the door.   
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"His mother," Mr. Strong said. "I wasn't home a lot...I didn't find out for...too long. And even then, I was skeptical. I never imagined... Anyway. We're divorced. Travis isn't allowed to see her...rather, the other way around."  
  
There was silence from Dr. Gary.   
  
"When can he come home?" Travis's father asked then.  
  
"Today, as far as we're concerned," Dr. Gary said, sighing.  
  
Another voice joined in then; Travis's. It was clear that he hadn't been listening. From what Lily gathered, he had been in the bathroom, changing.  
  
"I'm ready to go, Dad," his soft voice said, and Lily had to strain to hear.  
  
"Okay."  
  
Lily stumbled away from the door, frantic not to be caught, and waited until the door opened.  
  
"Oh, Travis," she said. "Good. I wasn't sure this was the right room."  
  
He smiled shakily. "You're alright."  
  
"Of course," she said, smiling reassuringly. "Looks like we're twins, too."  
  
He stared down at his arm, safely strapped to his chest, his jacket hanging over his shoulder on that side. "Yeah...I'm sorry you got hurt."  
  
"It's okay," she said. "It wasn't you fault."  
  
He nodded, then turned to his dad. "Dad, this is Lily."  
  
"We met, once," his father said, smiling through tight lips.  
  
Travis turned from his father back to Lily.   
  
"Was your mom mad?" he asked, worried.  
  
Too quickly, she said, "No!"  
  
He furrowed his brow.  
  
"She was upset, but just because I was hurt. She doesn't blame you or anything," Lily said.  
  
"Good," he replied, nodding.  
  
Travis's father spoke up, "Travis, I think we need to get going."  
  
He looked at his dad. "Right. Lily...I'll talk to you later?"  
  
She nodded. "Yeah."  
  
Travis gave her one last look as his father herded him off.   
  
She watched as they went, standing beside Dr. Gary. When he was out of view, she finally turned to the greying doctor.  
  
"I saw his arms," she said, eyeing him.  
  
The doctor sighed, staring off. "I really should have told his father."  
  
"Why didn't you?" she asked.  
  
"We made a deal," the doctor said, shaking his head. "If you'll excuse me..."  
  
Lily watched as he walked off, then shook her head, hurrying out to the car.  
  
***  
  
It was mid-afternoon, and the sun was shining, despite the chill in the air.   
  
Lily was bored.  
  
Her mother had gone off to work at three, leaving her home alone. She had already called Robbie, Ray, and Audrey to let them know that she was okay. They had offered to stop by, but she had declined. Now she wondered why.  
  
Sighing, she leaned back into the pillows at the head of her bed.   
  
Moments later she sat back up, grabbing her phone, dialing Travis's cell.  
  
It rang four times, until finally, his voice came on the other line, sounding groggy. "Hello?"  
  
"Hey...did I wake you?" she asked.  
  
"Yeah," he yawned. "It's okay, though. They kept waking me up every hour to make sure I wasn't going to end up comatose...or whatever."  
  
"Ugh," she frowned. "Sorry...I should let you sleep."  
  
"No!" he said. "No, talk."  
  
"I was just calling...because I'm bored out of my mind," she said truthfully.   
  
"Understandable," he said. "You doing okay?"  
  
"Yeah," she replied. "You?"  
  
Travis laughed. "Yeah, considering...listen, you doing anything right now?"  
  
"Hello? Bored out of mind?" she refreshed him.  
  
"Right...meet me at the station?"   
  
"You're allowed out?" she asked.  
  
"Dad's at work," he replied.  
  
"I'm not...but Mom's working, so..." she thought about it. "Yeah, meet you."  
  
"Okay...bye."  
  
"Bye."  
  
Lily grabbed her jacket, tossing aside her sling to shove her arm through the sleeve, and tucked her cell phone in her pocket.  
  
  
  
She had places to go, people to see.  
  
***  
  
Twenty minutes later, Lily was seated on the couch, her knees up, waiting for him to get there. She was absently tracing the material of her jeans, but looked up when the door swung open.  
  
Travis stood there, hair disheveled from sleep, having also discarded his sling.   
  
"Hey," he said, sitting at the other end of the couch, facing her, sitting Indian style  
  
"Hey," she said.  
  
There was a moment of awkward silence.  
  
"Sign my cast?" he joked to break said silence.   
  
"Only if you sign mine," she replied.  
  
"Got a marker?" he asked. "A light one?"  
  
"There's a silver sharpie around here someplace," she said, standing and going over to the table. "Aha!"  
  
Retrieving it from a jar of pencils and pens, she returned, sitting next to him.  
  
He shrugged off his jacket with some difficulty, and produced his left arm, pushing his sleeve up to the top of the cast.  
  
"Blue, nice choice," she said, winking.  
  
He smirked, watching her scrawl away in tiny letters.   
  
"There!" she said a minute later, capping the pen. "Done!"  
  
He twisted his arm to be able to read it.  
  
'My hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me. So won't you kill me, so I die happy? My heart is yours to fill or burst. To break or bury, or wear as jewelry, whichever you prefer. Love ya! - Lily.'  
  
He grinned as he read it, then grabbed for the marker. "My turn!"  
  
She handed over the marker and held out her arm.  
  
Concentrating hard on writing neatly despite his cast, Travis set to work.  
  
Lily fidgeted anxiously.  
  
"Done," he said, letting do of her arm.  
  
She glanced down.  
  
'I looked into your eyes and saw a world that does not exist. I looked into your eyes and saw a world I wish I was in. I'll never find someone quite as touched as you. I'll never love someone quite the way that I love you... Travis.'  
  
She looked up. "Even if you did steal that, it's incredibly sweet."  
  
He smirked again, and then leaned in to kiss her gently on the cheek.  
  
"Tease," she laughed as he pulled away.  
  
He shrugged. "You know me."  
  
But suddenly it hit her, how much she really didn't know him. As he reached over to set the marker on the table, his sleeve revealed his lower arm.  
  
"Travis," she said softly, eyes glued.  
  
"What?" he asked, looking back. He followed her gaze, then slapped his hand down on his shirt sleeve, pulling it down.  
  
"What happened?" she asked, already knowing the answer.  
  
"Nothing really. Vicious cat my mom has," he lied so easily that she almost believed him.  
  
She really wanted to.  
  
"Travis," said again.   
  
She reached out with both arms while scooting closer, taking his hand in hers.  
  
He pulled back for a minute, then resisted, giving in.  
  
She lifted the sleeve to his elbow, and let out a soft whimper as she saw the damage in full light. The old scars were barely noticeable beneath fresher cuts, the healing ones.  
  
She looked up, but Travis was looking down to his lap, head hung low.  
  
"Travis...why?" she asked softly.  
  
He didn't answer, and she ran her fingers gently over his arm.  
  
"Please...just give me a reason," she pleaded.  
  
"I...you wouldn't understand," he said, his voice choked with emotion.  
  
"Let me try!" she asked. "Please!"  
  
He looked up, and she was shocked to see so much hurt in his eyes. She had never seen anyone look that lost.  
  
"Travis," she said quietly, looking him in the eyes. "Tell me about your mother." 


	11. Trace the Scars, Fit the Pieces

Sorry it took so long to update, and that this one is so short. I've been short on time...okay, so I've really just been talking to my boyfriend every spare moment I get. Sue me, he's too far away!!   
  
Anyhow. Enjoy!!  
  
***  
  
Travis's eyes, locked with hers, were pleading.  
  
"Don't ask me to do that," he said softly, his voice raw.  
  
"Why?" Lily asked firmly.   
  
He closed his eyes, shook his head. "Please."  
  
  
  
"Travis...I heard the doctor and your dad talking, okay?" she confessed.  
  
His eyes flashed angrily, and he tore away from her, standing up. "You have a nasty habit of eavesdropping, Lily."  
  
She frowned. "I..."  
  
"I..." Travis mocked angrily, spinning around. When he saw the hurt look on her face, he stopped dead. "Lily...I'm sorry..."  
  
She bit her lip, watching him.  
  
"God!" he said suddenly, frustration evident. He came over to kneel in front of her. "Lily, I'm sorry. Please...don't look at me like that. I'm not like her, I'm not!"  
  
She let him take her hand, and squeezed it back just as hard.  
  
"I told myself I'd never be like her...never be such a fucked up person," he said, his voice pitched in a tone she had never, and would never, imagine coming from Travis.  
  
"What are you talking about?" she asked quietly, hesitantly.  
  
He looked up at her, eyes shining with tears he was holding back. Turning away, he said, "I can see the way you're looking at me. Afraid to speak.. Afraid...of me."  
  
"Travis," she said again, but he refused to look at her now.   
  
He stood, pacing, idly picking at his cast in a nervous way. "I swore I'd never make anyone feel like she makes me feel."  
  
"Does she hit you?" Lily asked quietly, head down, afraid to know.  
  
Travis stopped pacing then, staring dead at the wall. "I never could hit a girl. It just seemed so wrong. But why should it be? She does."  
  
Raising her head with new strength, Lily waited for him to continue.  
  
"It doesn't matter to her. Never did," he snorted. "No matter how small I was...how weak. It didn't matter."  
  
"Why do you still go back to her?" she finally asked, her voice pained.  
  
"Why?" he asked, turning to her, his face tightly drawn. "Because I love her, Lily. She's my mother. She could kill me, and I would still love her."  
  
Not able to understand, Lily simply shook her head.   
  
"I want to hate her. I want to wish her dead, but I can't," Travis said softly  
  
"But it's wrong!" Lily cried. "She's your mother! She's supposed to kiss your elbow when you skin it, not hit you. She's supposed to love you, not...she's supposed to be a mom!"  
  
"When I fell, it was my fault for running to fast. When she hit me, I earned it. I did something to deserve it. If I deserve this...maybe someday I'll deserve her love," he said, still staring at the wall.   
  
"But you don't deserve this!" she cried.   
  
"I do!" he argued loudly. "I deserve every minute, every second. I should be better. I should try harder, I should do something differently. It's my fault she hates me! I'm fucked up, Lily!"  
  
She cringed, shaking her head again. "No!"  
  
"Yes," he said forcefully, turning to stare at her. "I was born a mess, and I'll die a mess. God, how could I think...how could anyone love me."  
  
His voice got softer with every word, and he finally turned away, heading for the door.  
  
Lily leapt to her feet, her still sore body protesting as she covered the distance in time to keep him from opening the door.  
  
"Travis, no," she said, meaning several things.  
  
"Lily..." he said, smiling an odd smile. "You're so beautiful...so...perfect. I don't deserve you."  
  
The hand that caressed her cheek was cold.  
  
"Travis," she cried softly, tears spilling down her cheeks.  
  
"Don't cry over me," he said. "I'm not worth it."  
  
With that, he pushed past her, and was gone.   
  
Lily burst through the door, regaining her bearings, and whipped her head from side to side.   
  
A matter of seconds and he had disappeared.  
  
She stood for a moment, unsure, staring off into the distance.  
  
***  
  
  
  
Travis Strong was running. Though everything in him was telling him not to, he was pushing himself hard, legs pumping, lungs burning, running.  
  
Now she knew.  
  
The most perfect person he had ever met, the most beautiful, angelic girl...she knew his secret. Knew he was crazy, knew he was a freak.  
  
Tears streamed down his face, mixing with sweat that burned his eyes. His breath was coming in short gasps, and his legs felt rubbery and numb. He shouldn't have been able to run that far, that fast, that long. Not in his current condition. He was injured, half drugged on painkillers, and emotionally exhausted. But something kept him going.  
  
Escape.  
  
He longed for it.  
  
  
  
He fought for it, through questionable means.  
  
He wanted to find it.  
  
***  
  
He wasn't home.  
  
He wasn't answering his cell.  
  
He wasn't anywhere that she could find him.  
  
Lily was on the verge of panicking. She had to find him, but she couldn't find him. She couldn't ask his dad to help. Not Robbie, or Ray...she was on her own.   
  
And she had no idea what to do.  
  
***  
  
Travis stopped finally, out of breath, out of steam.  
  
He was exhausted.  
  
Shakily, feeling like hell, he climbed the stairs.  
  
He leaned against the door, knocking as hard as he could in this state, and waited,  
  
Finally, the door swung open.  
  
"Mom..."  
  
***  
  
Lily lay awake that night, staring at her ceiling, aching, and thinking about Travis. She was lost, confused, and helpless. She had no idea what to do to help him. To tell his father...unthinkable. To tell Robbie, betrayal. To tell Ray...well...not likely.  
  
But what could she do?   
  
Obviously, she couldn't do this alone. But she couldn't get help either.  
  
Letting out a pained sigh, she held up her cast, peering at the slightly wobbly handwriting, just barely able to see it in the dim light that shone in from the hallway.   
  
Travis...  
  
Lily groaned, sitting up in bed.  
  
On the table beside her bed, her cell phone sat dormant, plugged into the charger. She picked it up and dialed.  
  
Three rings, and then, "Hey. This is Travis. I'm not here, so leave a message."  
  
She hung up before the beep. 


	12. This Turpentine Chaser's Got Kick

Wow. Sorry this part took so long! I lost interest in the story, and then lost the interenet for several months. But here I am again, with a new chapter. I apologize again for taking so long, and I hope you guys are still interested!! The next part won't take so long, I swear!

--

Lily couldn't remember ever having been as relieved as she was that Monday, when she saw Travis in the hallway. Even though it was only a brief flash as he passed her by, even though he didn't say hello, didn't even look at her, he was there. He was alive, and well.

Well...he was alive.

The baggy hoodie he wore covered his arms, his chest, his neck, left everything to her imagination, which ran wild. Cuts, scars, bruises, so many possibilities, so little time before class. She was left to wonder as she slammed her locker, and ran to her first class.

First period could not have gone fast enough for her. On a blank sheet of paper, she counted out the minutes until her next class, where she could see Travis, and scratched out the minutes as they passed by. This did nothing to make time speed up, and in fact seemed to slow things down for her.

When the bell rang, she gathered her supplies and shoved them into her bag, creasing papers and losing all track of where everything was. She slung the bag over her shoulder and beat linoleum to the English classroom.

Travis wasn't in his seat. As the other students filed in, she began to think he wouldn't show.

Her heart skipped a beat when he walked through the door, but sank a moment later.

He looked awful.

The black hoodie hung off of his frame, which was slumped forward as if walking was too much of a chore. His eyes were ringed in dark circles, and his hair, usually neatly spiked, fell into his forehead in bangs that hung over his tired eyes. His messenger bag was missing, too. In fact, it appeared he had simply gotten out of bed and showed up with little or no regard to school itself. No English book, not notebook, not even a pen, unless it was hidden in one of his pockets.

He slid into the desk beside hers and slumped forward onto the desk, staring at the blank chalkboard with equally empty eyes.

"Travis?" she said, leaning over, tapping his desktop.

He regarded her with a slow, tired look, and without a word turned back to the board.

"Travis, you're -" she started to say.

"Class! Books off your desks," the teacher said cheerily, entering the room in a sudden frenzy, her skirt swooshing around her legs. "Pop quiz!"

"She sounds so happy," someone mumbled from the back of the room, and snickers broke out.

"Quiet now, kids, and prepare," Mrs. Good said, writing on the board. "An essay!"

Now, a chorus of groans.

"Hush," she said rather happily. "Our latest book, Fahrenheit 451. Such a controversy. Banned in some places, as a matter of fact. I trust you all read the ending as asked?"

There were some coughs and mumbles.

"Good," she continued. "Then, in essay form, that is to say formal, and no less than five paragraphs, all with topic sentences and supporting facts, tell me about the book and your personal opinion of it. I'll be looking for references, specifics relating to the book, so you can't slide your way past on this one. I will be able to tell if you read it or not."

Out of habit, Lily looked over at Travis, who showed no signs of caring.

"Need a trusty number two?" she asked, leaning over as Mrs. Good passed out lined paper.

He blinked in response.

"Ms. Randall, Mr. Strong," the teacher said as warning, slapping some paper down on Lily's desk. "This is a test. No talking until everyone's papers are on my desk."

Lily smiled her apologies and took her two sheets of paper, neatly arranging them. After she had passed on to the next desk, Lily reached into her bag and fumbled around. A few seconds later, she slyly slid a mechanical pencil onto Travis's desk.

"You're welcome," she whispered when he made no move to even acknowledge her favor.

Mrs Good returned to the front of the class. "You have forty-five minutes."

Lily bent over her paper, quickly making an outline of her topic sentences and some facts she wanted to use, trying to remember specifics from the novel they had been reading. Finishing that deserved a break, she thought, so she sat up straight, cracking her knuckles, and taking a moment to peer over at Travis.

He was still sitting, staring straight ahead, not having moved an inch.

She wanted to nudge him or tell him to get to work, but that would get the both of them in trouble, both of their papers torn up, both of them accused of cheating. She bit her lip and turned to look at the clock.

Uh oh. Spotted.

The teacher narrowed her eyes, looking to her and then back to Travis.

"Mr Strong, I suggest you get to writing soon, there are only twenty minutes left of class," she said, much to Lily's relief. No mention of cheating.

Travis shrugged, and muttered a barely audible, "So?"

"Excuse me?" the teacher asked, stepping forward as if to hear better.

"I said," Travis said calmly, loudly. "So?"

The teacher looked taken aback. "Mr. Strong..."

"What?" he said sharply, looking up with a glare.

Mrs. Good blinked a few times, not used to this quiet student acting out. Her eyes narrowed. "I don't appreciate that tone."

"And I appreciate yours?" he said icily. "I don't appreciate being spoken to like a three year old."

"Then I suggest you act your age," the teacher said.

"Oh, but I am," Travis responded, folding his arms. "Is it not appropriate for teenage boys to act out, and cause trouble in the classroom? After all, it's what I see happen day after day. And for the record, I doubt a three year old could be so articulate."

Mrs Good took another step forward. "Mr. Strong...I suggest you take yourself to Principal Waller's office."

"And I suggest you stop being such a bitch," Travis said, and a collective gasp came from the students. "But you don't take my advice, so why should I take yours?"

Mrs Good's eyes flashed angrily. "Get up. Get in the hallway. Now."

Travis smirked, but didn't move.

Lily stared openly and incredulously at her friend. This was not like him, not at all.

"I said -"

"And I heard," Travis said quickly.

"Then move!" the teacher shouted, losing her patience.

Without another word, Travis stood up and walked to the front of the room, turned, and passed her, disappearing into the hallway.

She could hear the students turning to look at each other, hear their whispers, and she sunk down in her chair.

Something was very wrong.

What else was new?

--

Lily didn't see him again until lunch, which made her wonder if he'd spent all that time in Waller's office. Pondering this as she bought her lunch and snagged a bottle of Jones Soda, she kept her eye on him as she strode to the table he occupied with Robbie and Ray.

The latter two were eating their food quietly, while Travis glowered. They exchanged glances as Lily sat down.

"Hey," she greeted, then turned to Travis. "Did you just get out or what?"

"Out?" Ray asked, jumping on a chance to speak after the quiet silence. "Where were you?"

Lily raised an eyebrow, then looked back to Travis, who merely nodded.

"I can't believe the look on Mrs. Good's face...I can't believe you went off on her," Lily said, trying to make light of the situation.

"You went off on Mrs. Good?" Ray sputtered in disbelief.

He and Ray leaned forward.

"Come on Swami, give us the details!" Ray said.

Lily winced, wondering if things were cool enough between the two for him to get away with the nickname.

"Don't," Travis shot, "call me Swami."

Ray merely sat back a bit and nodded in acceptance.

"Did you get in trouble?" Robbie asked.

"Or did they let you off cos it was your first time?" Ray said hurriedly.

Travis shook his head and stared at the table.

At that moment, a group of popular seniors walked by the table, laughing loudly, and jostling past each other in attempts to squeeze past the RFR gang's table and the next.

One senior boy shoved another, who went crashing into Robbie, spilling his drink all over Ray, who pushed his chair back in surprise.

The kids gave a glance to the table, but kept walking, and in a flash, Travis was on his feet. He grabbed the kid who had fallen by the sleeve and whirled him around.

"Hey!" the boy said in protest.

"Apologize," Travis said, jerking his head in Robbie and Ray's direction.

"What?" the kid laughed. "You crazy?"

Travis sneered, and repeated in an icy voice. "Apologize."

Jerking his sleeve out of the smaller boy's grasp, the senior laughed and looked to his friends.

"Man, he IS crazy," the kid said loudly. Several other tables turned their attention to the scene.

"Freak," the senior muttered, starting to walk away. "Better never touch me again."

Before Lily, Robbie, or Ray could even react, Travis threw himself into the midst of the seniors, seeking out the blonde kid who he'd accosted seconds before. He threw his weight onto the kids back, spilling them both onto the floor, and there, on his knees, turned the kid onto his back. With one tightly clenched fist, and the other heavily casted arm, he began beating and punching, alternating blows between the kids face and stomach.

Caught off guard, it took his friends a moment to pull Travis off of him.

"What the hell?!" they shouted, shoving him back.

Travis's three friends got to their feet, exchanging shocked glances.

Travis's face was a mask, slack and clear of emotion, but his eyes held a fiery rage, and he let out a feral scream as he executed a well-placed kick, catching the nearest senior in the solar plexus.

Said senior went down, clutching his chest, and two of his friends grabbed him by the arms before he hit the ground.

Though none of them made any move to fight Travis back, he zoned in on the one nearest to him, shoving him out of the way to get back to the original boy, who backed up, fear in his eyes.

Travis was not a big kid. He was slight, and looked so pale and weak that he could not possibly have done this kind of thing, this kind of damage.

Yet there he was, backing this blonde kid up against the wall and placing a savage punch with his casted hand to the boy's nose. Blood spurted from his nostrils, but Travis showed no signs of feeling any pain in his broken arm.

"Robbie, Ray!" Lily cried, surging forward.

Snapping out of it, they followed her into the group of students who had now accumulated in a ring around the fight.

Travis was panting heavily, sweating profusely as she approached him, but as she screamed his name, he appeared not to hear.

She grabbed him around the waist, pulling him back, and instead of bucking her off like she expected, he went slack in her arms. Not expecting him to give in, she was pulled down with him as he sank to his knees.

Awkwardly hugging him from the waist, she could hear Principal Waller screaming for the cafeteria full of bystanders to let him by.

She felt hands pulling her off of him, but was reluctant to let go.

She saw Waller and one of the male gym teachers pulling Travis to his feet, as if he would put up a struggle, but he just let himself be pulled up and escorted out of the cafeteria.

Two other teachers, one male and one female, gathered the entire group of seniors and soon they, too, were out of sight.

Feeling a hand on her shoulder, Lily turned around, tearing her gaze from the double doors Travis had disappeared into.

"Let's go," said a voice, belonging to Mr. Sykes, the history teacher.

Robbie and Ray, looking confused and upset, were also wrangled up, and they exchanged glances. It was more than worrying about spending the second half of the day in the office.

It was more about what the hell had just happened.

Lily felt like throwing up.


	13. Living In Your Letters

A/n: Next chapter. Read, review, and lemme know...I'm thinking I'll end it here. Should I continue? Maybe do a spin-off of sorts, about where he goes from here? I dunno..leave me lotsa reviews! :D

--

Dear Lily,

I bet you were surprised to find this letter waiting for you, weren't you? You probably think I hate you. Couldn't be further from the truth. I could never hate you, not ever. Maybe I placed my trust in you. Maybe I told you the deepest, darkest secrets of my life, things I vowed so many times never to tell anyone. And maybe you broke my trust. Maybe you spilled the biggest secret I had. Maybe you told it to the people I never wanted to hear it. But does that constitute hating you? No.

The truth is, Lily, I....I don't want to say I'm grateful. I'll never be grateful for seeing the looks in their eyes when they found out. The pity...it's a horrible look, you know? I never wanted to see it again, not after they first took me away from my mother. But the sadness, the disgust, the everything in my father's eyes when they saw my arms. And it wasn't just there, Lily. Do you know how humiliating it is to be sitting on some table, covered in a thin sheet while people are prodding and poking at you, and seeing all these things you wanted to hide from everyone? Including yourself? They went in looking for bruises. From her. I begged them. Honest to god, I fucking begged them. A teenager sitting there sniffling and crying while they're telling him to please remove the gown. Telling him to stop crying, it was okay, but it wasn't okay, Lily, and they saw. My arms, my legs, my stomach. Every inch of me. Her bruises, my...punishment.

That's when they decided I was a lunatic. Sorry, that's "troubled youth". That's what this places is called, by the way. Sumner's Home For Troubled Youths. We all know what it is, though. It's a psych ward in the form of a group home. It looks okay from the outside, like some big mansion or something, but once you get inside, it's just like a hospital. All white walls and sterility, and charts and medicines and fucked up people. Pardon my french.

There are some other kids here on my floor. The kiddie ride in an amusement park of psychosis. Okay, sorry, that was just melodramatic. Anyway, there are some other kids here. Boys rooms on one side, girls on the other. I think they expect us to bond or something. Become friends and help each other fix ourselves, like on TV and movies. Except no one really says much. We're all kind of scared of the other. We have charts, but we're not allowed to see them. Not even our own. So no one really knows who's here for what reason. Which, when I think about it, is kind of nice. Don't have to see those looks anymore.

I have to see a psychiatrist twice a week. Wednesdays and Saturdays. Then group sessions with a licenced therapist every other day. (You know, I never knew there was a difference between shrink and "licenced therapist" before now. Guess there is.) They want me to talk, but I don't. They expect that at first, in group, because it's so open and frightening for us newcomers. Whatever. I'm expected to open up and pour my heart out to Dr. Eimer, just because it's one on one. Right. She's the only one who knows why I'm here. I think I hate her for that. I'm ure as hell not going to talk to her because of that.

Anyway, I digress. I'm way off topic here, aren't I?

My point was, while I'm not thrilled to be here ( I hate it every single second of every moment of every day), I guess it's better than the alternative. I don't know what happens after this. I don't know if a few bruises and mine and my father's statements are enough to get her put away or not. I do know that that's the only way I'll never see her again. I know a part of me hopes she's prosecuted, and the other part can go fuck himself for thinking otherwise.

I suppose this will help me, this experience. I suppose I'll bond with someone, and we'll share all our thoughts and fears and hopes and dreams and all that other shit they want us to share in sessions. I guess eventually they'll find out why I'm here, and I guess eventually I'll stop. They'll fix me, and I'll be cured. Or something.

Either way, no matter what happens, I guess it's obvious I wanted out. I wanted a way out of where I was in life at that point, and I didn't know how to get it. I couldn't ask for it, so I had to show people I needed help. I chose to do that by mouthing off and beating some kid(s) up. I still cringe to think about that. I tried to send a letter of apology to Mrs Good, but what would I say? Sorry I mouthed off like every other kid, but my mommy abused me and I like to bleed for fun? Uh, no. I can barely stand to think of those kids I beat on...how are they? Dr Eimer won't tell me, so I think I must have really done some damage. I'm sorry I did it. (But there's another side of me that's glad, is that sick and scary or what?)

So...I forgive you for telling.

Right, you're thinking who the hell am I to "forgive" you, right? When this was the nicest and least thing you could do for me? Well, sorry, that's all I can do for now. I sure as hell can't thank you. Not yet. Maybe someday. Maybe.

Anyway, I'm sorry, I have to get to group, so I'll have to cut this short. Heh. Cut. How's this for messed up? We're not allowed to have anything sharp here. ANYTHING. We have to write in felt tip pens, because pencils are sharp. We have to account for all silverware at meals before anyone can leave the room. I'm not even allowed to have stupid stuff, like CD cases, or whatever. I'm not even allowed to keep my nails long, because those can be used for bad, evil purposes. This is a prison, and I hate it. Little do they know, if I want it bad enough, I can find it. Like in the stalls in the mens washroom? Third one down, there's a sharp edge on the paper dispenser. Or during group, sometimes I can slide hands around back and the edges of the chair are rough enough to rub my skin raw.

I probably shouldn't be telling you this. Obviously not something you want to hear, and may very well take away what little sanity I have in this place, if you chose to point this out to the authority figures here (I hope you won't). I am trying, Lily. I'm trying to be okay, but sometimes I just need it. I hope you can understand that, and I hope my trying is enough for now.

I'm sorry.

For everything.

Most of all, I'm sorry I can't be there for you.

I really do have to go now. For the best, probably. Don't want to get all sappy, eh? Anyway...write me back, okay? Maybe you can be my sanity. My solace.

My angel.

I love you, Lily. Remember that.

- Travis


End file.
